So I was invited to a second marriage wedding shower...

If she is throwing it herself... maybe that's a little gift grabby. But if it is an excited family memeber, I am all for it.

Wow @Janeen couldn't say it any better. If you do not want to go to the shower then don't go.

Honestly, my FH and I had been together for 10 years (and living together for a total of almost 4 years in the last 5 years (there was a year break, because we moved back to our hometown and went to live with our respective parents) before we had our wedding shower (it happened this past May).

We were hesitant on asking on having a registry - but we decided, why not upgrade everything for a married life together. No one voiced a problem about it (maybe they were bothered by it, but that bother never got to my or my FH's ears). Plus all my old stuff always goes to my sister (all my college stuff, went to my sister when I graduated) - she has already requested our things when we buy a house (because we will have new things, that were gifted to us at our shower). I did not have a problem with her request (nor did my FH), we had already made the decision she would get the majority of everything (we would keep some things).

Honestly, it is a new marriage - a new start. She can have another wedding shower.

The world is a crazy place....

Everyone feels differently, so I say go with what you feel.

I've said it before, I'm not a fan of showers or registries period, but especially if your already established and I don't like the idea of "upgrades". Most people will give something at the wedding, usually cash. Take that and get what you need or want. Same with baby showers ...I think there should only be one with the first baby, and then give a personal gift at the birth of the next.

So unless it's a first baby, or a young couple starting out with pretty much nothing, I will decline. I just give at the wedding or when the baby is born.

Yeah, this is my 2nd wedding and FH's first. Guess I am gift grabby....who knew?

View Quoted Comment When someone in my husband’s church family) suggested giving us a shower ( 2nd marriage for both of us) I have to be honest I was very embarrassed and tried to get them not to! We both had all we needed and I’m not one to make people feel obligated! They did and I appreciate everyone of them but people have so much on them already and I just didn’t fe right about it!

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I could see that being pretty bad. A lot of the bridal shower is for those starting off in life, not those who have already lived awhile. But I do kind of get the idea that people will still want to celebrate our upcoming marriages.

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That sounds a little bit harder (but sort of a kind gesture) for your FH's church family to do this for you. It was good it was for both of you together so that it would not just be you.

My daughter didn't get the experience of a bridal shower with her first marriage which ended shortly after. Didn't have a wedding. She's getting married again and wants a bridal shower. She doesn't know it, but I'm throwing her one. People are so judgemental.