Hi All,
We are getting married in PR (where my family is from) in March and are incredibly excited but stressed. We sent our invitations and have received most of our RSVP's. Before we planned the wedding & signed the contract, we called my fiancé's extended family (which is quite small & is his only family besides nuclear) to make sure the date worked for them and that they'd be willing & excited to make the trip. We received a definite yes and very very positive response. This was 18 months ago.
Over the last 18 months, including the last time we saw them on Christmas, they have expressed a lot of excitement about the wedding, asking tons of questions, and saying they were making a family vacation out of it. We were really excited because we are very close to them, closer than my Fiancé's nuclear family.
In the new year, we sent out the wedding invitations and **radio silence**. The day before my birthday my fiancé's Aunt & Uncle call to say they can't come to the wedding because of health, money, covid. We understood - we offered to pay for their entire trip, gave them a list of hospitals/emergency rooms nearby, told them we had originally hired a paramedic for the event and that one of our guests ran an ICU, provided all the COVID regulations which are very strict, and explained that all events were 100% outdoors. They still said no and said "they had to make sacrifices for their health & safety." It hurt but we understood and didn't want to be pushy.
Fast-forward to 2 days before our RSVP deadline - we still haven't heard from my fiancé's cousins. Then we get a text from one saying they won't be coming and that they'll celebrate with us in our home state. No reason why, etc. This really hurt because we are the closest to these two and they were the two of all saying no matter what they'd be there, etc. We know it isn't a money thing nor a work thing because we know they're financial situation and they WFH and aren't required to appear in person. Then 30 minutes later, the OTHER cousin texts to say they're not coming either because of money/scheduling. We understood, even though we were frustrated and very disappointed.
Yesterday, we went home to Fiancé's parents house to tell her that her sibling and her sibling's family would not be coming. She was dumbfounded as no one has said anything to her. We explained why and she interrupted with the news she heard through the grapevine that they're all going on vacation together THIS WEEK (which was planned only 3 months ago).
I am FURIOUS and feel hurt/betrayed. PLUS our count is significantly off now because they bailed at the last minute. I'm not saying they should not go on vacation. They should and deserve to but this is my fiancé's only family and we are so close to them and honestly feel bamboozled by the sob stories we received about health, money, and covid. I am fuming and am doing best to hold my tongue but this needs to be addressed before I lose it. Advice?
TDLR - Very close family said they couldn't come to wedding due to covid, money, health issues last minute. Now we found out they're all on a vacation across the country 4-5 weeks before our wedding.
