Soon to be military Air Force wife

I'm not military but my FSIL married a marine. It hasn't been easy for them. Before the wedding she was at home in CT finishing up school while he was stationed in Japan. Then they moved to CA and he got deployed for a year and she came home because she couldn't deal with being alone. Now they moved to NC while pregnant and 4 months after the baby was born he was deployed (he had been a drill instructor after his deployment in CA so he hadn't been deployed since). He's currently still deployed and missing all of the baby's milestones.

I'm not trying to scare you but it's the reality of a military wife. FSIL has made friends with other people going through the same thing. She comes home as often as she can to be around people who love her. She's basically a single mom right now but she has a strong support system. You can do it. Just surround yourself with positive people.

@Brittney

I know it's going be hard at times. A lot of the time. I had to go the whole month of February without really even getting to talk to him because of the course he was in.

Luckily he only has a little over two years left. I couldn't imagine raising a child while my husband was deployed. It would be so difficult. I'm just hoping and praying that he is done for good after these next two years.

There is the internet and Skype. If you get on base housing there will be other military wives /husbands to talk to. Try to get a job on base once your married it will help keep you busy. But hopefully with him being in the air force he won't get stationed some where crazy that you can't come with. If it's Germany or Japan you can go too.

I did the same thing my FH is a marine and we started our relationship long distance. We survived on Skype and it made our relationship grow stronger. There were bad days and I'll admit that when I'll be at the mall and see couples holding hands and I get angry because I can't have that since he is defending our country. But marrying a marine is one of the proudest things I could ever think of since you have all the courage to let him go and defend his country. Many deployments aren't dangerous and he can take leave and come home. It will all work out I promise! (Plus my dad and two brothers are marines so I have had much experience)

I'm currently in the same situation as you. My FH is currently stationed in South Korea right now for the year. He won't find out where he will be stationed next until around this September. It's scary thinking about a big move and then him possibly getting deployed but I will agree with the other ladies that you will have a big support system. My cousin currently lives on the Army base in SC and she has so many other military wives that she talks to and also a lot of kids for her son to play with. Moving around and maybe not seeing him for days, weeks or months at a time is the reality of it. It freaks me out too thinking of the future with our children and all of that, but I couldn't imagine life without him so I've accepted that this is going to be a part of me becoming a military wife. If you're interested in keeping in touch here is my email address. ********@******.***. I'm learning as I go too in this military life so it's always good to have a big support system!

I forgot to mention the only difference with our FHs is that mine is actually in the Army. Times will get hard but just enjoy the time you have together and remain strong!

My best friend is an air force wife and she's the head of some kind of committee that checks on the spouses during deployments. I forget her official title. I'm sure She would be more than happy to talk to you about it, not just about deployments but about being an air force wife. They have been married for 22 years so she's been through it all. If you want, send an email to WW Lynnie (? Since WWKatie is apparently gone?) and ask her to put you in touch with me.

Marrying a Navy guy...and their lingo is different than all the other branches. I ask him to "translate that into civilian" all the time. We've done the long distance thing but he hasn't been deployed yet...but it's coming. There is usually a military spouses organization around and there are usually "spouses of deployed" dinners put on by the USO here in Lejeune. It's hard starting over every time he gets orders so I usually get on Meetup and throw myself into an activities group to meet local people or work on school since I am in a self-paced distance learning course. Where do you want to visit?. There might be orders there...he and I are discussing a duty station in Italy for his next tour so we can explore Europe and he has some obsession about taking me snorkeling in Dubai, because he's been but I haven't. It's not civilian life, but it's not all bad either.

@Angelina

That's what my mom keeps telling me. I will have a big support system up there with all of the other military wives. That is something I am excited about. I have made a few friends already up there.

I would love to keep in touch! I will probably send you and email today? What state are you currently in?

@Desireecox Oh yes I will admit it too! I get so jealous when I see other couples together out in public. One of my BM is soooo affectionate towards her fiance in front of me all the time. Sometimes I think it's rude and inconsiderate. But I don't think she has a clue lol.

I am so thankful for Skype. Being long distance for the first 8 months of our relationship definitely made us stronger as a couple.

I am so proud of him. And I am so proud of his job! I am proud to be a Air Force wife so soon.

Thank you for your encouraging words. <3 :]

@Jacqui76 My fiance has an AF buddy who's wife is head of a committee that sounds very similar to the one you are referring to. I am excited to get to know other military wives and be able to talk to other women who can relate to me and each other.

How do I send an email to WW Lynnie?

@Amber

Haha I feel like every branch has their own special lingo. I have definitely had to ask him to break it down to me before.

He is part of a church group on base that a lot of women whose husbands are deployed go to. I have talked to a few of them and I am so ready to be connected with that group.

I have a friend who is stationed in Lejeune!

I haven't really thought of where I'd like to go. I think Germany would be really cool. And he would looooove to visit there. He always talks about going there someday.

I am excited to a military wife. I know it won't be easy at times. It's already really hard and I am not a wife yet haha. But thankfully he only has two years left. I am hoping he won't re enlist.

I'm a future Coast Guard wife. We spent nearly every day together for the first year and a half until he went to boot camp. He is now stationed 1,300 miles away and I have only gotten to see him once since December. I understand the fears of being in a relationship with someone in the military. There's really no way to make long term plans and theres always the fear of them being called away. I don't think it is something you really ever get "used to." It's just something you learn to live with because you love him and he loves his country. My fiancé is currently deployed, granted it is much shorted than other military branches, but he will not be back home until our wedding day. We are almost wedding day twins! Make sure to look around FB for Air Force Wife groups.

The base I am currently at has an AMAZING key spouse that holds monthly get togethers. Get involved on base. Often times they will have facebook groups, so you can stay up to date on everything happening. Congratulations on your engagement.

@Brittany

Aww haha we are!! Just one day apart :] we are getting so close!!

Yes the fear of them being called away is probably the scariest thing ever. I try not to think about it.. idk if it's something I should think about.. or just wait until the time comes. And hope and pray that a deployment doesn't come. Even though I feel like that is selfish - I know he wants to deploy at some point before his last two years are up.

It is something I have to learn to live with but I am more than willing! I love him so much and I am so proud of what he does.

I hope y'all have a beautiful and wonderful wedding day! :]

And thank you - I will go look for some groups on Fb. I didn't even think about that haha.

I'm a future army wife. My best advice would be to stay positive but also know you're going to have to roll with the punches. FH and I have been through quite a few deployments so I can tell you Skype and FaceTime definitely help. Keep the communication open and as for the lingo, you will definitely pick it up. Good luck to you, and try to find people to talk to if you can.

@Michelle, I am not sure how to email WW Lynnie. I did know how to email WW Katie. Let's just skip the WW people- are you on facebook? You can find me there: Jacqui Peck.

This is exactly why they need to bring back the way to connect with other WW users, that we used to have here.

@Jeanne- Key Spouse! That's what she's called. Thank you.

I learned everything I could about the Marine Corps within the first three months of our relationship. Just google the daylights out of it.

As for the deployment...it's stressful, and you're right - it will probably happen soon. Did you get military clauses in your contracts in case he deploys *before* the wedding? It usually involves being able to move your date without incurring any extra fees. Many people in this situation get legally married before the deployment, and have the wedding when they get back. DH got back from a deployment this past October, and since we're technically in peace-time, he is not eligible to deploy again until late April, which is why we chose February.

I am a soon to be Marine Wife. my email is *********@*****.*** if you ever want to talk! and @MrsRivera I learned about the Marine Corps the same way! I learned the lingo by listening to him talking and things like that, but also doing a lot of googling! You can find my facebook: Samantha Esposito. Same profile picture as the one I have here.

@Leanne Thank you so much for the encouraging words. It is good to know that if the time comes for him to be deployed that I will have such a strong support group.

@Jacqui There were a few Jacqui Peck's when I did a FB search. If you search me I'm under Michelle Knapp and my profile picture is of me and fiance!

@MrsRivera I will start googling! Lol.

Yes I did all of that. If he gets deployed before the wedding then I can just change dates with all my vendors :]

He assured me that he won't get deployed before the wedding though. So that's a relief.