Stepdaughter trouble

I need more background story of it. Why is she full of drama?

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So she's has made made a comment on everything that I decided. I have my MOH doing the bachelorette party and she states why can't I do it ...I told her your not the MOH ..and that's not what I decided ...so she stubble off saying guess I'm not important ...then says what if I don't want to be in the wedding ...I said ok ...I really don't have the energy to deal with her mess ...it getting on my nerve

View Quoted Comment Wow. Sorry you have to deal with her. She wants attention, and control.

View Quoted Comment Is your MOH willing to let her help plan a small part of the bachelorette party? That might let her feel like she's included in the plans, but without giving her full control of everything. If she decides that she doesn't want to be in the wedding party over this, then that's on her and not on you.

View Quoted Comment I agree with Belle. She definitely wants control and attention.

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That's what I said ....She doesnt want to help anyone ...I can't cater to her and it's my wedding ...she needs to go up for real ..if she continues this then I'm going to have to let her go

View Quoted Comment I think it’s best to talk with your fiancé but I would not let him talk to her. Just getting suggestions from him, because he knows her better than you. I probably just ignore her though.

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I told him about and he basically

Said that he spoken to her and told her that if she didn't get her act together she was going to be out of it ...cause he's tired of the drama

I love him cause he's a very good guy and he doesnt like no type of drama...He's a cop so he has to deal with that at work and he doesn't want to have that issue at home

This is your step-daughter, you are the motherly figure in this situation - it is 100% on you to be the bigger person and make more of an effort to build a relationship with her. Most daughters won't immediately like their dad's new wife, you have to build that trust. It sounds like you're stooping to her level rather than showing her the higher road.

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Ive known his daughter longer than Ive known him ...I was her boss at one point so dshe knows how I am ...If I don't want to deal with the drama I'm not ...I wouldnt take that from my own kids ...This is not nothing new we are 7 years in ..and yes we have a good relationship ...I'm always there for her

View Quoted Comment If you have known her longer than him and were her boss, there’s all the more reason for her to have built in Resentment. Rise up. Be better.

View Quoted Comment I can't comment on her behavior. But from pre-teens on, something you really have to check on, before things blow up, is , Are you doing things the approved or correct way? Or does the young one have even a small but defensible case?
...If your step daughter asks others or reads up on showers and bachelorettes, standard is that those who volunteer to work on things, may be 1, may be all, work together. Bride does not appoint one person, the MOH. And MOH should not just do it and present it to other . Considering you and MOH are going against standard good manners or etiquette, I don't think you are being fair, and I am sure her Dad would agree with her not you, if she goes to the point of letting him know, she ia asking you follow standard Etiquette, and you are pushing her out from planning, when any bridesmaid should not be treated that way. And she would be right. Work things out so MOH works with any interested bridesmaid, if you can. Also, not agreeing with you, or suggestions of opinions different from yours, should not be a problem, unless she delivers them while screaming or cursing at you, or throwing a tantrum.
If I were your FI, I would be very upset you dropped my daughter, short of tantrums and such. I would take it as a sign you would continue to treat my child badly, not a good sign for the future.

View Quoted Comment Understandable...but I'm not going to be disrespected by no young adult....This is my wedding and it's going my way...I have a 21 year daughter and she's trying to figure out why she's acting like this....she's always like this my FH has two other kids that lives with us...I gave everyone of our children a part...My FH even stated to her that he will not tolerate her drama...I will not bend over backwards to make her happy....we have 8 other kids to think about....

Removing someone as a bridesmaid/groomsman means the friendship/relationship is dead. Be prepared for an irreparable family rift if you do this, resulting in your fiance possibly siding with his daughter. Have him speak to her about what is going on before you do this.