Strip Clubs for Bachelor Parties

FH is going to a strip club and I'm giving him a stack of singles. We've gone to strip clubs together and we know our boundaries.

Ummm no strip club! I was a fully clothed waitress a strip club years ago, and things do happen between most strippers and guys. They know how to make their money, so if the girls can get away with it, they'll let the guys touch them or what not. Besides if I knew my FH went to a strip club I would wonder what was turning him on more...me or the thought of a crazy stripper rubbing up on him.

I'm not okay with it because I'm an insecure, jealous crazy person. Really. And he's cool with that because he married me. *hair flip*

(ETA and I admire those gals who are cool with it! What's it like to be a sane person?!)

If NotFroofy had wanted a strip club, I wouldn't have cared. But we're so old and boring, neither of us did.

Well, unless you count the joint bachelorette in the traditional Korean bathhouse. But the people taking off their clothes there were very old Korean ladies, so I don't think it counts.

No strippers for this bride and groom! We are both very opposed to them. He doesn't feel comfortable doing that. It's funny because he's the one that brought up the point that having a last "night in the single life" was dumb because you're engaged.

Catsbonincats yaaasss girl

I don't agree with it. Neither does my FH. He thinks it's awkward and trashy. (Not complaining, LOL!) But that's just us. in my personal opinion I have never understood why people say a bachelor / bachelorette party is supposed to be your "last chance of freedom" or "last chance to not be tied down" -- wait, what?? You're already tied down though.. You chose to be in a committed relationship.. AND you chose to ask your partner to marry you, therefore, you've BEEN tied down buddy. People look at marriage like "Oh, you're losing your freedom to do whatever you want". No, you're not. Unless you're in a controlling relationship. Other than that, you will not be losing any freedom. You're going to be doing more things together, sure, but that's apart of marriage and partnership!

Most of the time I think it's the GM that try to talk the Groom into going to a strip club. I feel like they could do that on their own time, especially if they're single, because in the near future when they are getting "tied down" and married, I'm sure their FW will not appreciate it either.

Good luck to you. Hope you can find a compromise

To me that is completely out the window - unacceptable. Thats just me, but if my man has to entertain himself with other women, I don't think he's ready to marry.

I very much enjoyed my evening at Chippendale's in Vegas for my bachelorette party and DH enjoyed his evening at a strip club (and got a lap dance). I see it as entertainment that just happens to be sexual in nature, and guess what, it's fun for women and men. Would I want him to make a habit out of going to strip clubs? Absolutely not, but I trust DH to know how to act.

A genuine question for those of you uncomfortable with strip clubs. Would you also be uncomfortable watching porn together?

My FH told his friends "no" to strippers, hired or at a club. I told him I didn't like that a lot of bachelor and bachelorette parties ruin marriages before they even start. I think they're just going to go out drinking.

Eta: I don't feel it either. However, I would rather then go to a club than hire one privately because that usually ends in sex.n

@Kmess I would even go with my FH to a strip club, whatever. My problem is when they're hired because that's when things go awry. An childhood friend was a stripper in college... I learned far too much about what happens at those times.

My fiance and I agreed before we were even engaged that our bachelor/ette parties would be a night out at the bar with our separate groups and coming home to each other, if not just a sleepover type thing for me. His cousin has different ideas, and I'm worried my fiance won't stand up to him about it. I'm totally with OP that it makes me uncomfortable having mostly naked women grinding on him right before we're getting married. and the poster that said it knocked down her self esteem. It knocks down my self esteem even thinking about it.

Not a fan, I expressed to my FH how I felt about it and he isn't too keen on the idea either. Idk, I think the tradition of going to a strip club as the groom's "one last brawl" or whatever is gross.

We are Christians and that is the basis for our relationship so no, he won't be going. But that's his decision. I would be extremely hurt if he went but it's not even an issue.

It's not about trust, it's about respect. To assume that someone being hurt about their FH going to a strip club is actually them fearing what FH will do is judgmental and quite frankly wrong. If you both agree they're fine, go for it. But we chose each other for life the day we decided we were getting married. I wouldn't disrespect him that way and he will extend me the same courtesy.

FH used to go all the time when he was living the Bachelor life. That's what him and his friends thought was fun for a night out. When I first met him I honestly didn't care but as I started falling for him I started hating the idea of him going there having girls give him a lap dance and him throwing his money on her. This isn't even an insecurity issue because I am very secure. We talked recently about it and he knows my distaste for it however I know he'll probably end up there that night! He wants to go and his friends would bring him so... I'll be hurt but hopefully I'm so wasted that night I won't care Lmao!

I told my fiancé that I practically EXPECTED him to go to a strip club because of how much his GM like to party and because of what is always seen in the movies. My brother is one of his GM and he called the BM to see what the plans were. When he suggested a strip club, BM said that my FI doesn't want to go to one. I must say I was so relieved!

ME! im 100% against it... he is all for it.... my issue right now

not a trust issue

just the quote "My opinion is that having a woman do that would never be ok outside the walls of a strip club so why should I be ok with it just because it's a strip club" totally NAILED IT!!!

I myself would never think its okay for me to visit a strip club and have another man all over me and throwing away money.. when i could spend it on him and give him my time and attention. IT WOULD FEEL WRONG.

girl the struggle is real!!!!! it makes me sick and to the point of not going through with the wedding. Its not like he has never been before i came along. he knows whats there and yet he wants to go again because its His Party this time.

UGHHHH!!!!

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RIGHT!!!! especially if its that important to him to go!!!!

I'm pretty late to this forum... but we don't agree with bachelor/bachelorette parties being the last day of "freedom". I don't know how this became a thing but it makes absolutely no sense. I wouldn't be okay with my FH having a nude woman dancing on him..at anytime...so why would I be okay with it at a bachelor party. "last day of freedom" makes no sense.

We are celebrating our bachelor/bachelorette party together. We will be having a party by a lake, with all of our friends. It will be 10x more fun than going to a sticky, gross bar/strip club and wasting all of your money.

I am with you on this! Strippers/ strip clubs are disgusting. I don’t understand how people see any entertainment in them. If your relationship is based on loyalty, respect for one another, and true love then there is no strip clubs/ strippers. I let my man know if there’s any strippers then I’m calling off the wedding. I don’t care how much money we will have spent at that point. Luckily my man agrees with me I just have to get it thru the thick skulls of his stupid groomsmen.

I feel the same exact way. I just don’t know how to tell him because I know it’s his night with the guys so I don’t want to come off as controlling but thinking about another girl all over my FH makes me sick.