Strippers vs. no strippers...

Maybe I'm a weirdo but I'd much rather he go to a strip club or private party with a stripper than a normal club or bar. Strippers are working to get their money and go home. Women in a club are another story. They could be looking for love, looking to get laid, or just looking for fun. You never know... I dnt know anyone who has had a stripper-free bachelor party and I doubt my FH will change that. lol. I'm not having strippers at my party because half my friends want male strippers and half want female strippers. It would be far too awkward having to choose one side or the other so we're going to dinner then club/bar hopping. If you feel that strongly about it, you should talk to him and let him know where you stand. I dnt think you have anything to worry about. That's just my 2 cents

@Sharon, you are too funny. I must admit, I cnt imagine it either. Porn is grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat "entertainment" lol

I hate to break it to everyone, but every guy in the world, single, married, gay, straight is lusting after other people on a pretty regular basis. The good guys don't act on it. I must admit I lust after hot guys, I think it's human nature.

lol@ msshay...thank god for the internet coz now it's free!

I don't see any problem with it... if you trust him, then you have nothing to worry about.. it's traditional.. last night single and probably won't be able see any more stripper after.. or he can if you go with him.... some men enjoyed thier women going to the strip with them...I'm just saying

@sharon, yes i is! ;-) If only I knew that before I started buying dvds lol. WE will def be on my fave site tonight :-D

Woohoo! sounds like a great date night to me

I also do not like strippers at all. I also do not want my FH having one at his bachelor party and thats why I am all for a joint party. I have been married once before and he was not the right guy and we did not even have a party. So this time around, I want it to be fun .

We are both against the stip club scene. why wait to committ and spend your life with someone but before you do you'd want to look at half dressed nude women or men.grinding and touching on you or either you or fh touching on them.if you think it's ok for that to go on --in so many words you are saying it's ok to cheat.when all of the bumping & grinding going on do you think he will be thinking of.you--yeah right.although it maybe traditional in your book but in mine you are opening a can of evil spirits. are there any true god fearing people on here?not to get religious but that's you guys thing.

Don't worry, I don't take any offense. I've had to (in so many situations I can't even count them) sit down with friends and family and explain why I dance, what the appeal is (because it's not just money. But then, I note the difference between an exotic dancer and a stripper.), what I think about when I'm doing it, etc. Living in the adult entertainment industry is kind of like a whole different world, and once you've been doing it for awhile, it's hard to remember that most people don't understand the ins and outs of it.

That being said, FH and I have a very um...unconventional relationship. For example, I have a girlfriend. (No, she's not a dancer. And we've known each other for going on 8 years. Long before I ever met FH.) He's totally okay with it. He's a bartender in the strip club where I used to work. I'm totally okay with it. We both watch ridiculous amounts of porn (I get a giggle out of narrating it like it's the golf channel) and we're both fine with it. (cont)

I think its important for everyone to remember we are all comfortable with different things because all our relationships are different. Some people have open marriages while others are completely monogamous and how a relationship works depends on the couple in it. My husband doesnt like the idea of me going to a strip club and im happy to not go because it isnt something I feel so strongly about that I would want to hurt him or debate abbout it and he feels the same. We would however be happy to go and see a burlesque show together. We have watched porn together and usually sit laughing about it but other couples are really into it. If the strip club issue is something you are very passionate about then I think he should respect that or the two of you should have a discussion about it openly.

Neither of us consider any of that cheating. But we also understand that every relationship is different, and therefor what constitutes cheating is different. I've never cheated on anyone in my life. If FH and I had agreed that me seeing a girl at the same time was cheating, then I wouldn't be seeing her. "Cheating" should probably be used as a relative term to define rule-breaking as laid down in one's relationship. Not as a blanket term to be applied to all.

Carmen I love how open and honest you are about everything. Cheating definately differs in every relationship.

Well said Aussie. It's not about strippers, it's about communicating with your significant other about what your boundaries are. Regarding religion? I'm spiritual. I don't fear god, because I don't think he means me any harm. We all have different beliefs and that is what makes us different, unique and us

I have never wanted to see a strip show..they don't turn me on at all..even gave away tickets given to me as a birthday gift once..fh adamantly does not want a bachelor party...doesn't see the point in them..says he'll party at the reception and get his lap dance later! doesn't mind if I have one though [I'm just doing a girls night out]--definitely doesn't believe in putting himself in compromising situations and neither do I..strippers are more interested in getting paid but some of them have met their significant others that way...

@sharon, it sure is!

I agree with danielle 100%! My Fh doesn't not look at porn and has never. I completely feel that it is cheating by looking at other naked woman!

@danielle;well said.i agree with you totally.best wishes to you and your fh.

Every relationship is different. My DH and I know what our rules and boundaries are. They might be different than someone else's, but they work for us. We know that we can look at someone else as long as we don't touch. I know I'm very guilty of looking at guys and I'm sure he's looked at other girls. It doesn't bother me at all. I know he likes to look at porn sometimes. That's his choice. Sometimes we watch it together just cause it's fun to make fun of it. Personally I would love to be a dancer. It would keep me in shape, bring in good money, and it would be fun. But my DH doesn't really want me to so I won't.

I really didn't like the idea of my FH having a stripper at his bachelor party and guess what? Neither did the other wives...Good thing I met my FH later in life because if he was in his 20s to mid 30s, I am 60% there would have been a stripper or they would have gone to a club probably. So nope, those guys have been there, seen that already. *shakes head*

And nope they didn't have one.

I actually have been to bachelorettes with male strippers. No biggie. LOL

Anyway, we didn't have one.

I still think porn makes life interesting though.

Trust and communication are the big issues to focus on here.

Good luck.

I havent' read all the posts but guys are visual. they just are. male dancers/strippers don't appeal to me but that's my preference. i trust my man. the only stipulation i've given him is to please have his party on thursday b/c i don't want anybody showing up drunk for the wedding and his brothers after 40 plus years still don't know their limits. plus i'm trying to figure out why the groomsmen are even discussing that with you.