Struggles with getting started/grief

Maybe see if you can get a buddy here possibly for the same wedding month.

That is such an encouraging point about your then-fiancé being more involved when he realized your need.

And Liz, I hope you to get some great support.

Hello! I am very sorry for your loss. It is hard to plan something big without that special person in your life. It is very valid why you feel lost in this situation, as I can imagine you had always planned to have that special person with you during this time. There are a couple things that stand out that could be areas for exploration. The first is your fiance, and his support. While he is more hands off, if you have not already, I would share with him how you feel and that some more support from him would be helpful. Another area to explore is the relationship with your other friend who is also experiencing grief and loss, and her help with the wedding. While you are concerned about how she feels, it may also be an area of healing, growth, and give her something to focus on. It may even build your relationship stronger. Lastly, it is okay if you are not ready to plan a wedding and feel sad and lonely at this point. If you cannot afford a wedding planner, I would not spend the money, as it will be sort of a bandaid to the deeper feelings you may have about your wedding and missing your best friend. This may be a wonderful chance to build a new connection and find ways to honor your past friendship. Almost anyone who you would invite to your wedding is someone who can help you! People love being asked to help with stuff like that, and it is a great chance to build a new relationship. It is okay to take time to process through what you are feeling and start planning when you feel ready.