Tattoos on bridesmaids: What should I do?

Everyone has already said what I would... I am not a tattoo person, but I know that if someone who asked me to be in their wedding had an issue with my appearance I would probably politely tell them to shove it and step down. These are your friends for goodness sakes.

Give them a shawl if you must, but that is really the only OK option that I see.

I just wish people could offer me advice to deal with this problem instead of telling me it is rude, this something my parents are very big on and I am trying to make things good for everyone, I understood when I posted the originally enquiry that this was a sticky subject telling me something is rude is not helping me with the issue, I am trying to solve the problem the best can.

A theme is a theme, it doesnt mean get into authentic costume that could trick a historian. who cares if your Fh's family doesnt like your BP's choice of lifestyle. its YOUR day and they are YOUR people.

its rude because its like asking a fat person to lose weight before the wedding so they dont mess up "your vision"

So much popcorn today!

And yeah, they're your friends. You shouldn't try to change them just for photos.

I am between disappointing my friends and disappointing my parents, aunts uncles, etc, I am trying t come to a happy compromise.

A persons tattoos are not a problem to be solved. anymore than a fat person or a person with bad skin is a problem to be solved. if you are more worried about his families response to them than you coming across as an unaccepting friend, then ask them to cover them. just know its rude and will result in less friends.

It's my family, not my fiance's family.

Some people are so touchy about tattoos! Your hair is part of you and I wouldn't think it would be uncommon for brides to give hair suggestions. Note that I say suggestions. I don't think it's rude to suggest things to your friends, if done in a friendly way. And if they don't want to cover their tattoos, just drop the issue. If you explain the situation with your family being really conservative they may want to do it just to help you make the day go smoother.

I agree with the others though that if you decide to suggest a cover-up of some sort (make-up or clothing), that you should pay for the amount. It's like if you require everyone to use your MUA you should pay for that.

I have an idea....ask your family to cover their eyes as your BM's come down the aisle? Just a thought?

You asked on how to handle it nicely. My opinion: Don't do it! Reasoning: It's rude. Warn your parents that a few of the girls have tattoos that may or may not show. But that they are grown adults and you cannot force them to be covered and it was their decision.

You are getting offended because we think it is rude, and that's not helping. Well I would be offended if I were a BM that was asked to either cover up a tattoo or wear a shall (when it obviously wasn't originally a plan)

You asked for advice. The advice youre getting is to change your thought process and allow the tattoos. You cant force people to provide advice they dont believe in. If you insist on going this route then you have few options that wont offend. Thats the truth.

I have no constructive advice for you because I honestly believe that whether you use make up, a shawl, or a dress to cover it, youll sound like a bridezilla who cares more about photos and what your fam thinks than you do about your friendships.

I like Carlene's idea the best so far.

If its YOUR family you have more access to tell them, i appreciate you are conservative, but my friends are the way they are. did they even ask you to cover tattoos or are you just assuming they will be bothered?

You have gotten multiple advice responses.... SAY NOTHING about the tattoos, and buy shawls for the girls to wear. This does not have to be an issue.

Carlene, I agree. Just warn your family that you aren't responsible for their tattoos.

People gave you solutions. You can buy shawls for them and ask them to cover them. If you do that then don't tell them why because it's rude. If you have to ask why saying "can you please cover your tattoo because I am embarrassed of how it will look on my wedding day and my family will judge you" is rude then no amount of explaining will make you see. The people who would let that effect them are ridiculous people. You can be conservative with what you do with your own body if they judge other people for getting tattoos when it has no effect on them what so ever they're just a bad people and they shouldn't be coddled for being that way.

Also, OP I get where your coming from with your conservative family, so I sympathsize on that part. Sometimes if FH has a drink (even if it's just 1) my grandma will start talking about him saying "maybe he drinks too much!". If they don't want to cover their tattoos, unfortunately you may have to just deal with your family, though. I'm sure they'll understand that it's not you with the tattoos.

I respect all of your opinions...I have decided not to even bring it up. The tattoos are not that outrageous, I think my parents will be able to deal in the end, hopefully their eyes will be on me and wont even notice. I don't want to do anything that would upset my friends, thank you for making me aware about how you would all feel.

Just drug them and skin them once they're passed out.

Everyone has given you a resolution---Buy them a shawl. But we're going to tell you it's not right to fit into a mold that you want because it's a vision.

You have two reasons going...

one is that your fam is conservative.

the other is that you don't think it fits the theme....

Is it really about your family or is it about the "look"

If it's about your family, it's not their place to judge them and if they are...so what?

If it's about a look, then you have this whole getting married and having a wedding all wrong.