Terrible Officiant = Memorable Ceremony for the Wrong Reasons

Oh no! I'm so sorry! Did everything else go well?

A tsunami? Uhh...

Also, I'm really sorry that happened to you... Maybe you can do a vow renewal with a different officiant?

I'm sorry. I hope in the near future this will be something for you to laugh about. And if not, the ceremony did deliver its promised result: you're married! Try to focus on the positives and find humor in the negatives.

OMG Carlyle, that is horrifying. I'm so sad for you. On the bright side (okay, I'm stretching here), I bet that your guests weren't as upset by this as you were. Okay, it doesn't make it excusable but I do find that family-member officiants have a bit more sympathetic crowd because, well, they're family.

When the dust settles, it might be worth a conversation.......

WTF? What a jerk! I would have just been livid...and in tears! Sorry that happened...did you or your DH confront him and inquire why he felt like it was OK to do that to you both??

Oh man, I'm really sorry to hear this. My father is a Methodist pastor, and it sounds like your FIL was recommending the traditional program/religious ceremonies that are laid out in the United Methodist Book of Discipline...but then he changed it up? That's awful. My father specifically said that he just wanted to be FOB and definitely wanted no part of our pre-marital counseling (HA!), but he was happy to recommend someone. We went so far as to not even get married in his church, but have booked another Methodist church in town. We really wanted to keep family entanglements out of it, and thankfully they didn't push otherwise. If they had, I probably wouldn't have been able to resist. :/

All the more reason to have a vow renewal in a few years and get another wedding dress!

Sorry that happened. I hope at least your reception went well. Try to keep perspective; if you married the man of your dreams, you got the most important thing right and you have what you need.

I was thinking this story would be about a wedding you attended but now that it's about yours it's kind of a huge bummer. I'm so sorry this is your memory of your ceremony!

I'm inclined to agree with Celia on this one...

I was totally against a vow renewal while planning the wedding, because it was so much work, but now we're definitely doing one.

Luckily I found out at work today it seems some people couldn't even hear him talk, another huge bummer because he's done enough weddings to know to speak loudly.

Not the best way to start off our in-law relationship, FIL just made it clear he doesn't respect what DH and I want.

I am with you and would have been so freaking mortified!! Yes in the end you are married but it isn't the same. I would definitely talk to him and let him know how disappointed you are in his decision to ignore your requests. I was going to have my brother do our ceremony and had that "gut feeling" *Along with great advice from WW ladies* and decided against it. We are so happy with our officiant and I cry every time I read what she wrote. We aren't even married yet!

OMG Carlyle that's awful! I'm so sorry that happened that was definitely NOT the moment to make it about him. I can't believe he chose a ceremony other than the one that everyone had agreed on. Hope at least everything else went well!

That is really too bad, I'm sorry this happened to you.

So sorry this happened to you

Sorry this happened to you I hope the rest of your wedding day was lovely. I would be crushed if this happend to me.

Yikes. I am so sorry this happened to you! Worst part is having to remain civil afterwards. I'm sure his intention wasn't to embarrass you, it's just awkward always having to see him and that being in the forefront of your memory. I totally agree with pp's the a vow renewal 5 years down the road might be a good idea. This time with someone else... just so you can have it your way.

On the bright side.. you're married!

So sorry this happened to you.

I'm so sorry this happened. What does your DH think about what happened?

The day was great before and after the ceremony, and being married has made it all worth it.

Unfortunately our next meeting will definitely be uncomfortable since not only did he not do the agreed upon ceremony, but he also barged into the bridal suite 5 minutes before the processional started telling me I needed to change the way people were walking down because it took time away from the "mother's having their spotlight". Say what? They walked down exactly the same, but made two groomsmen walk the aisle twice.

DH's brother is getting married in June, I already feel terrible for the brother's FW because she pretty much has no idea that her wedding won't be about her.

That's awful. I would definitely warn your FSIL.. there's no reason that should happen twice. They have time to find someone else.