Thank You Note Etiquette - Groom's Help

Hmmm. I'm leaning towards you need to write the gifts if they were bridal shower gifts. If it were a coed shower or the wedding gifts it might be different. But obviously he still will benefit from the gifts, sooo... interested to hear what others think.

I think you should write thank you for any shower gifts you received yourself. For general wedding gifts he can, and should, help.

View Quoted Comment Exactly my hesitation! Like I want to give him something like this to do, but you’re reasoning is exactly why I paused. Hopefully some others chime in!

Yeah, I feel like you should do this. I wouldn’t be fundamentally opposed to receiving a thank you note from the guy in this situation but it’s more meaningful from the bride AND i feel like part of the shower thing is you getting the opportunity to bond with his female relatives. You also can’t include personalized notes like “it was so great to see you” ...and I feel like there is a definite risk of offending some old aunt.

you COULD have him add his own line at the end about the gift if you want to involve him
or if you’re just looking to help lighten the load, have him address the envelopes?

If the gift was addressed to you, the thank you notes should come from you. He can certainly help with the wedding gift thank you notes, as those will be for both of you.

Great advice, all! We've been getting some miscellaneous presents in the mail, so for those addressed to both of us, he's volunteering to take over the thank you's for those. Good call on me doing the ones for the bridal shower. I appreciate the input! Glad I posted to confirm my feeling of the need to pause for a second before handing over the reins!

I don't think it really matters. I wrote all the thank you notes for the bridal shower butnis till put his name on them.

But still* (I hate not being able to edit on mobile). Besides they are gifts for the both of you.

I think it would be important for you both to sign the signature of the card. Maybe you guys can get a little factory going...you write the thank you note and sign, he signs, then stuffs the cards, seals them, and sticks a stamp on them. That way he can equally be involved, and he's still taking some stuff off of your load!

I think you should write it because it would be more personally due to the fact that you was there and he wasn't.

I honestly don't think that's appropriate at all. It was your shower, they came to see you, you should be the one to say thank you for coming and for the gifts.

You could have him address the envelopes, put the stamps on, seal the envelopes, etc. I agree with the PPs, but at the same time I think most people will just be happy that it's hand-written and not the typed crap we've been seeing lately, so there's no way for them to know if it's your handwriting or his.... so idk, I feel like it would be petty for someone to be like "*Gasp* the husband wrote the thank you note, what a petty bride" but I would probably have him do the envelopes just in case.

I agree with others, you should write the thank you notes for the shower. When I wrote mine I did tell my FH what I was writing to his family but that was it.

Thanks everyone! I already did all the thank you notes per the advice I received last night. I appreciate everyone's help!

I’m writing them and having FH at least sign them. The gifts are for both of us and we should both thank them, even though the invite says it’s to honor me.