My daughter and her fiancé have just begun their wedding planning process and are facing a conflict with the location of the wedding and the size of guest list.
The bride and groom do not live in either of the cities where their families live. My husband and I will be paying for the entire reception and rehearsal dinner and have a healthy, but far from unlimited budget.
The groom is somewhat insistent that their wedding be in his home town, as many of his family and friends do not have the means to attend an out-of-town wedding. While many of our family and friends would be able to travel and would make the effort to do so, it is not an easy location to get to and an expensive town in which to stay. We feel strongly about the level of reception, as it is a reflection on us and all of our family and friends would travel to be there. The total guest list the bride and groom have compiled is larger than we are comfortable with (175 invites) given that we are paying for everything. It is heavy on their friends, which is great; the family/family friends list is about equal bride/groom. The bride has suggested having the wedding in the groom's home town and reducing our costs by choosing a lesser venue and eliminating/reducing other expenses; my husband and I are not ok with that solution.
We have suggested the following options: 1) reduce the number of guests to 120 expected attendees; a realistic compromise, but they feel they are not able to eliminate more than a few 2) wedding weekend that is immediate family and bridal party only so that no one is offended 3) a very casual wedding for those that are within close proximity - only the bride's immediate family would attend 4) have the wedding in the bride's home town and their guest list can remain as is, knowing there would be some that would be unable to attend. I REALLY want to ensure this wedding doesn't affect our relationship with our daughter and future son-in-law. There have already been tears. Help!
