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Chandra
Master May 2019

The long awaited Probam!

Chandra, on June 9, 2019 at 9:52 PM

Posted in Married Life 42

It’s been just over 4 weeks now and I can finally do my ProBAM! It might be long with advice, budget breakdown, but most importantly PHOTOS!! So buckle up! (Or just scroll to the bottom for photos We got engaged May 25, 2018, married May 11, 2019 in Wilmington DE and partied it up after in...

It’s been just over 4 weeks now and I can finally do my ProBAM! It might be long with advice, budget breakdown, but most importantly PHOTOS!! So buckle up! (Or just scroll to the bottom for photos Smiley winking

We got engaged May 25, 2018, married May 11, 2019 in Wilmington DE and partied it up after in Swedesboro, NJ.

Guest count

Invited: 120

RSVPed Yes: 54

Attended: 50

This was totally expected and 100% okay. We initially said 60 guests was ideal. The only local folks were hubby’s immediate family. The closest guests beside them were still 2 hours away.

Highlights: -Rehearsal Dinner! My mother in law had it catered at their house and it was so fun to see everybody and just hang out for a bit.

-Getting ready was interesting, I was so calm people kept asking if I felt okay!

-While doing first look and wedding party photos, a bus drove by the park and honked before getting on his loud speaker and telling us congrats! There were also a couple of people on the park board that stopped by to ask if they could use our photos as part of their “Friends of Wilmington Parks” facebook or something…no idea what came of that!

-Our moms “surprised us” with a fun slideshow of photos of us as kids and a few of our more recent “selfies for science”. We knew there were doing it because they mentioned it when they met last summer and I had to forward photos of hubby to my mom so they could put the slideshow together. Still cute even though I knew it was coming!

-Our food was delicious, even better than our food tasting! I wanted seconds but I was so full I didn’t make it back up to the buffet.

-The speeches were wonderful. My brother in law (best man) gave a really nice one, my MOH’s was kind of awkward, my dad gave a really nice impromptu speech, and my brother gave one towards the end of the night.

-There was lots of dancing! We told the DJ no group dances. At all. Towards the end of the night, some of my aunts had asked the DJ and he said no, unless it’s okayed by me or hubby. They asked us, and we granted them ONE cha cha slide. Even my dad got out to dance to it. It ended up being fantastic!

-We closed out the night with having all the guests hold hands in a circle while we had one last dance. It was a really sweet moment!

Downfalls:

-My sister in law somehow slipped through the cracks and wasn’t on the schedule for hair. Luckily she has a pixie cut and we got it sorted out.

-Nobody brought the terrariums for the centerpieces to the hotel, so we had my BIL run back to the house (literally 2 miles away) and grab them.

-We had an audience for the first look. I had intended for it to be me and him only, but people caravanned on the way from the hotel to the church and followed us there and I didn’t stand my ground for that.

-The ceremony music got messed up some how? I don’t know. I couldn’t tell. They also forgot to turn on the AC in enough time for it to cool the chapel down so it was a little toasty.

-Some of the music we chose for things in the reception (grand entrance, anniversary dance, dedicated to moms song) didn’t get played or played in the wrong spot.

-My MOH was a total sourpuss about everything.

-We didn’t get some of the photos I had requested

-We had a koravai that was supposed to be displayed with the wedding cake that didn’t get put out until we asked where it was. But they were prompt and got it taken care of immediately.

Advice:

-STICK TO YOUR GUNS. If you don’t want something, make sure it isn’t done, and vice versa

-Spend the night beforehand alone if you can. My MOH was being a grump then because I tried to politely hint that I didn’t want to share the king size bed in the bridal suite with her (there was a pull out couch) and she was passive aggressive throwing stuff around making a big to do. *eyeroll*

-Put your trust into your vendors. They’re experienced and have probably done this enough to make good calls. Realize that once the day comes, you’ve done pretty much everything you can. But also remember it’s okay to ask to fix something if you see it’s wrong!

-HAVE FUN!

When we started planning, we set a budget of about $15,000. My budget spreadsheet says we came in around $13,500, but I don’t know how much the RD cost, or my mom’s welcome bags, and I’m sure I forgot to log some things, so I think realistically, we came in closer to that $15 if not a little over. Here’s the big stuff:

Budget breakdown

Stationary: $749

STD Magnets: $50 (Vistaprint)

Invitation Suite (50): $381 (Basic Invites)

Postage: $89

Wedding Programs: $40 (DIY/Canva)

Monogram Embosser: $45 (SayabellStamps, Etsy)

Acrylic Escort Cards: $66 (Basic Invite)

Thank You Cards: $78 (Basic Invite)

Attire: $1886*

Wedding gown: Stella York 6593 - $1375 (Brides by Young - Schaumburg, IL)

Dance shoes: Purple Satin & Sparkle - $69 (danceshoesonline.com)

Alterations: Bustle/press only - $250 (Aynur’s Alterations - Schaumburg, IL) Tuxes: Joseph Abboud Light Gray Satin Tuxedos, Apple tie - $192 (Men’s Wearhouse)

Bridesmaids Dresses: Koh Koh Cap short sleeve evening gown - $60 (Amazon)

*Does NOT include bridesmaid dresses or groomsmen tux rental costs

Hair & Makeup: $900

Daneene Jensen & Associates - Doylestown, PA

Flowers: $375

Sola wood floral arrangements from HeyBouquet (Etsy)

1-9” Bouquet

1-7” Bouquet*

2-6” Bouquets

6 Boutonnieres

2 Wrist Corsages

*Won in instagram contest

Photographer: $2103.75

Perfect Day Photography - Swedesboro NJ

All day package, unlimited photos, photo album and large print.

Ceremony: $150

St. Nicholas Ukrainian Catholic Church - Wilmington, DE

Reception: $6000

Catering: $5050 (Holiday Inn Swedesboro, NJ)

Cake: Included in package Sweetsboro Pastry Shoppe (Swedesboro, NJ)

Florist: Included in package + $90 for upgrade (Petals & Paints, Swedesboro, NJ)

Day of Coordinator: $499 (Simple Meanings Entertainment LLC, Parsippany, NJ)

DJ: $599 (DJ Denz, Simple Meanings Entertainment, LLC, Parsippany, NJ)

Misc. Decoration: $614

Now what you've all been waiting for, the photos!

Detail shotcfb_1215557.jpgInvitescfb_1215559.jpg

Dad's first lookcfb_1215517.jpg

He practiced this face for a whilecfb_1215535.jpgMy pretty ladiescfb_1215537.jpgHis handsome fellascfb_1215539.jpgThe whole wedding partycfb_1215541.jpgLovey Dovey facescfb_1215543.jpgShe told him to sniff my haircfb_1215545.jpg

Birds eye view of the ceremonycfb_1215547.jpgFirst Kiss!cfb_1215549.jpgalso, can we talk about my MOH's face!? I think she was mad that H's aunt/godmother were both fixing my train.Post ceremony kisscfb_1215551.jpgHubby's Parentscfb_1215553.jpgMy Parentscfb_1215555.jpg

Escort Tablecfb_1215561.jpgGIft/Card Tablecfb_1215563.jpgFavors cfb_1215565.jpgGuest Bookcfb_1215567.jpgCake!cfb_1215569.jpgKorovaicfb_1215571.jpg

centerpiecescfb_1215573.jpgSweetheart Tablecfb_1215575.jpgFirst Dance - probably my fave picture!cfb_1215577.jpgDaddy Daughter Dancecfb_1215579.jpg

Mother Son Dancecfb_1215581.jpgFIL during "Shout!"cfb_1215583.jpg


42 Comments

  • Cristy
    Master May 2021
    Cristy ·
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    Congratulations Chandra!!! Everything looks so beautiful, and you guys look really happy!! Sounds like you didn't have too many hiccups! That's wonderful. Thanks for sharing so many pics!!

    • Reply
  • JEANIE
    Expert April 2021
    JEANIE ·
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    Congrats! Everything looked so beautiful! All of the months of hard work paid off in an amazing way! I wish you guys all the best!
    • Reply
  • Mcellist
    Super March 2019
    Mcellist ·
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    Beautiful! Congratulations Smiley smile

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  • Courtney
    Master December 2019
    Courtney ·
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    Congratulations! I love how you incorporated cultural aspects into your wedding. A friend of mine had a Lithuanian bread blessing as part of her wedding and it was really neat to watch.

    • Reply
  • Jo
    WeddingWire Administrator May 2015
    Jo ·
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    I have been SO EXCITED for this BAM! And let me tell you, the advice, the pics, and all the details you shared did NOT disappoint! What a gorgeous, amazing day, congrats!!!

    What was up with your MOH? And what happened with your music?

    • Reply
  • Patrice
    Dedicated July 2019
    Patrice ·
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    Everything is lovely! Random.. but what did you put in your favor boxes?? I still need to fill mine but can’t decide!
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  • Chandra
    Master May 2019
    Chandra ·
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    I don't even know! I had a few people tell my mom that they were watching her up there rolling her eyes every so often during the ceremony. My SIL was about to slap the crap out of her!
    Music issues were just songs not being played at the right time or not at all. And the ceremony music was soft and they couldn't turn up the volume or it would feedback horrendously.
    • Reply
  • Chandra
    Master May 2019
    Chandra ·
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    Traditional Ukrainian Pysanky!
    Hubby's aunt makes them and we thought it would be a great unique favor!

    The long awaited Probam! 1
    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Super October 2021
    Nicole ·
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    Looks so beautiful!! Congratulations!!

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  • Jo
    WeddingWire Administrator May 2015
    Jo ·
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    That is not cute, I hope she's ok

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  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
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    Omg, I had been waiting to see your pro photos and then realized you posted these while I was on my honeymoon so I missed it and just found it now!

    Everything looks BEAUTIFUL. I think we had the same card box hahaha... Michaels?

    Also weirdly similar situation with the Cha Cha Slide for me too... my husband wanted to play it SO BADLY and I told him absolutely not, our wedding is not a bar mitzvah or a sweet 16 Smiley tongue but once we got there and I read the mood of the reception I realized he was right, it actually might be fun. We used a Spotify playlist for our music so I basically just surprised him and queued it up. It got SOO many people out of their chairs... including my mom's best friend's 92-year-old mother! I admitted he was right about that one, it was a good call to play it, but I'm glad we didn't do a ton of group dances either, it can get a little cheesy lol.

    Do adults share beds with people they're not in a relationship with...? Lol. I would've been so weirded out if my MOH wanted to share a bed with me... that sucks that she was so sulky, I'm sorry you had to deal with that and I hope it didn't put too much of a damper on your day!

    Your photos are sooo gorgeous. You both look so happy and in love, I got a little teary eyed scrolling through them Smiley smile I'm so happy for you!!

    • Reply
  • Kelly
    Dedicated September 2020
    Kelly ·
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    So pretty!! congratulations. Love the purple!


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  • Sherry
    Master September 2019
    Sherry ·
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    Everything came out great! Congrats!

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  • HayMrsO
    Master October 2018
    HayMrsO ·
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    Congratulations! Everything was beautiful. I agree, I love your first dance picture.

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  • D
    Dedicated July 2020
    D ·
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    Congrats, what a special day! Thank you for the whole break down of things. It helps us girls in the beginning stages of planning.
    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
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    Chandra, the one of you both kissing in the church is absolutely beautiful. That’s my fav.
    Did you love your cake?! I remember seeing some of your inspiration photos and the cake topper. I think it’s stunning.

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  • Chandra
    Master May 2019
    Chandra ·
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    We got the kissing one as an enlarged print! I'm obsessed with it haha.
    And that cake was soooo amazing. H and I were just reminiscing about the the other day haha.
    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
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    I can see why! It’s so striking yet comforting. Your cake does look amazing.


    Oh! What’s the Korovai? Is it a cake or bread?
    • Reply
  • Chandra
    Master May 2019
    Chandra ·
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    The korovai is bread! I didnt have a chance to try any of it. H said it was just ok. His mom had it ordered from a bakery and shipped so it wasnt super fresh.
    • Reply
  • Tiffany
    Expert March 2020
    Tiffany ·
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    Beautiful! I love all the purple! And the invitations were stunning 😍😍
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