Those of you who kept your maiden name, has it been tough to deal with comments from others?

View Quoted Comment Wow, I have never seen or heard of such a thing. Then again, haven't lived in a mega city since I was an infant.

Tell them you can do whatever you want and to go kick rocks. It doesn’t mean you don’t love your husband.


I’m a physician so it would be next to impossible for me to change mine. I wouldn’t go by “Dr. Husbandsname” anyway. So it would be a lot of paperwork and money to still go by Dr. Maidenname anyway. So I saved myself a LOT of time and headache and money.
I’ve had maybe 2 people ask why I didn’t change it. It’s because of above reason, and also because I’m too lazy to deal with it. I also like my name better. But at the end of the day ITS YOUR NAME. You are also not your husbands property and you owe nobody anything. So, people can say whatever they want.

View Quoted Comment That’s my favorite option for combining! I’m not a huge fan of hyphenating but I do like two last names. I’ve considered that as well

View Quoted Comment Thanks!! I definitely get that. My cousin has much more of a career than I do and no one questioned her when she kept her name. I really don’t have that as a solid reason but still feel very attached to my name as it’s apart of my identity and I’m also a modern non-traditionalist type of woman. My cousin sort of broke the ice by going against the grain with that, so I don’t think I will receive comments from them, but hoping I don’t get too much crap from my fiancé’s family.

View Quoted Comment You can tell your fiancé and his family now that you plan on keeping your own name so no feelings are hurt. That it is your name and none of their business and it doesn’t affect them in any way. They have no reason to be upset or offended over a personal choice you make. You don’t have to defend it because of a career, you simply don’t want to change your name. That’s all.

I changed my name with my first marriage because I felt it was expected. This time around I hyphenated my old married name with my new one. No one has said a word about me keeping my ex husband's name. Nor should they it's none of their business.

I plan on both keeping my name and taking his, and he will do the same. We will be Mr. and Ms. Wife-Husband.

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That is so rude. Would he have thought to say that about your husband not changing his name?

View Quoted Comment He’s very traditional and said that since I’m the woman I should change it. I seriously told them that my husband should change his last name and his brother was so shocked I could have even suggested this. Mind you, he’s in his early 30s so it’s more shocking to me that he’s super traditional. Have you had any comments from family yet?

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The engagement isn't even official yet. So, no. I doubt I'll get many, on my side at least. I already did something non-traditional with my name. When I got divorced, I changed my last name to my grandma's maiden name, instead of keeping my ex's name or going back to my maiden name. I changed my first name, too. After that, I doubt anyone would blink an eye at me and my husband hyphenating our names together.

Did you ask him why you should change your name because you are a woman?

View Quoted Comment Oh nice. That’s a good compromise- both of you to hyphenate.


His brother is just very traditional. When I asked him he said it’s cause it’s the way it should be. Thankfully, my husband doesn’t think the same way and told me we know we are married, so my name is my name.

This is why you should keep your maiden name: https://www.italymagazine.com/post/i-was-issued-codice-fiscale-my

I know i'm in the minority here: I'm a groom 🤭.
My fiancée is pretty set on keeping hers and I told her to decide whatever she wants , I will support her.
Neither of care AT ALL about what our families think: Both my mom's side of the family and her dad's side are very opinionated/judgmental and love to talk behind other people's back. So they can think whatever they want behind our back as long as my fiancée is fine with her decision. They also know we won't care about their potential backlash if they ever tell us in front of us .