Too soon for bridesmaid proposal?

I got engaged on Christmas 2020, and we're planning for a September 2022 wedding.

I already asked all but one of my bridesmaids, I started with my Maid of Honor, who is my cousin, I asked her first cause she was nervous I was going to ask my best friend instead of her and I didn't want her worrying about it. I was also asking her two sisters and another one of our cousins, I have a family full of big mouths so I didn't want anyone spreading rumors of who I was asking or wasn't asking and they're my cousins so their not going anywhere. One of my bridesmaid who is not my cousins was also asked this past weekend, she's my best friend and introduced me to my fiance and her boyfriend is a groomsman, we've been best friends for 15 years and she's one of the only people who knew a proposal was happening, I know she's going to be in my life forever so I wasn't worried we'd fall out in the next year.

My last bridesmaid is my future sister in law, she will be asked next week. Her and my future BIL live out of state and are coming to visit, since we don't get to see them as often I need to ask her when I can since after this trip the next time I'll see them is probably their wedding in August.

A lot of people will say "something may happen between now and the wedding and you may not actually want them" but I think it depends on your relationship with each person, every person I'm asking is someone who has been in my life for over a decade, all but two are blood relation and aren't going anywhere, and the two that aren't blood relation are family for all intents and purposes so I'm not worried.

Too soon! I think this time next year would be the best time to ask congrats on your engagement btw!

I would wait 9-6 months prior. A lot can change in a short amount of time!

View Quoted Comment Love it! Two are my really close friends and one is my future sister in law also!

View Quoted Comment Thank you!

View Quoted Comment For me, I want them there during finding my dress and stuff so I’ll probably ask them when that rolls around. Two are great friends and one is my future sister in law. But yeah a lot can change!

View Quoted Comment For sure! I had them for all of that stuff too!

View Quoted Comment I’ve heard bridal dresses take anywhere from 8 months to a year 😲

View Quoted Comment I agree! 😍

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The one friend I'm asking, is also the friend who's handwriting is tattooed on my ribs, so if our relationship changes I have bigger problems to deal with than kicking her out of my bridal party But always do what's best for you, I was so excited to get planning and my family is really really close so I didn't want to constant be around my cousins and have this secret to share!

View Quoted Comment You're ring is beautiful.


I had a best friend I had been friends with for 16 years. I was going to definitely have her by my side for my wedding. But when I got engaged she became all jealous and was trying to put me down. I texted everyone a picture of the ring and said I got engaged. All my friends and family were excited, except her. Her response was just "cool". For a best friend I'd been bffs with for 16 years and her response to me getting engaged "cool". Then my fiance told me it's his grandmothers ring and she wanted me to have it. So I texted everyone it's his grandmothers ring she wanted me to have it. My best friend responded with "I knew it, I told my mom it looked used!". So I decided if that was how she was going to be now that I'm engaged she isn't going to be in the wedding. I definitely don't need someone trying to knock me and my fiance down during this time. I need supportive women by my side. We ended up getting into a huge argument and I ended my friendship with her. Honestly it was the best decision I had ever made.

Not at all! Our date is September 24th, 2022 and I’ve already asked my bridesmaids! They loved it because it gives them plenty of time to save for whatever is needed instead of shelling out all the money at once.

View Quoted Comment Holy crap!!!! That’s messed up!

I'd wait a little closer to the time being, perhaps when you're a year out. My fiance and I got engaged in September 2016, at which point I hadn't even yet met one of the women I ultimately asked to be a bridesmaid. The only person I asked well in advance was my oldest sister to be my maid of honor (she said she'd do it on the condition that I never once called her "matron of honor", even though she's been married for a while now AND is eight years older than I am). I knew I wanted to ask this one particular friend of mine, but she was planning her own wedding at the time, and we hadn't set a date yet, so I wanted her to get her own wedding out of the way first. When we thought we'd be getting married in April 2020, I finally asked both of my friends in August 2019. For my bridesmaid proposals, for each lady, I wrote a poem about how our friendships originated and evolved, and then in each one, the last two lines were "*insert friend's name here*/Will you be my bridesmaid?" My one friend cried, and the other said it was perfect. More importantly, they both said yes!

If you’re sure about who you want to stand alongside you then ask away! I got engaged last September and asked my bridesmaids in November/December, even though our wedding isn’t until 2022. If you know who you want then I think you can ask whenever ☺️

Is your wedding a destination wedding? We are planning to ask our bridal party early like you (2 years out) to give everyone enough time to save for the event. 6 months out is too close in my opinion since it’s such a huge financial burden to just spring on people. Plus your bridal party should be your very best friends; if your relationship can change that dramatically in a year then maybe they should’ve not been asked in the first place. Just an opinion but you do you girl!

View Quoted Comment That’s what I was thinking honestly like if I don’t think they will be there in a year and a half or whatever why even bother 🤣 but a lot of people seem to have horror stories 😯 no it’s not destination, I wish! A lot of my family wouldn’t be able to make it if that was the case !

View Quoted Comment I got some super cute stuff of Etsy to make some boxes. One is my fiancé’s sister and the other two are very close friends. One came with me venue shopping and I hadn’t even asked her yet!

I don't think that's too early to ask! I asked mine already and I'm getting married the week before you.

View Quoted Comment So exciting !!!!