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gratia01
Devoted January 2021

Too soon for Save the Dates?

gratia01, on January 22, 2020 at 3:04 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 1 12
(Sorry kind of long description ahead!)


We are getting married on January 2, 2021 and I ordered our save the dates about a month ago because I had a coupon for Shutterfly that was going to expire. Most of our guests are family and already know when we plan to have the wedding, but I’m still sending out save the dates because they’re cute and I’m excited! I’ve been told that 6 to 9 months is the standard to send save the dates but I’m tempted to just send them now. I have them already and like I said, most people are already aware of the date. My one concern is that people who don’t already know when it is are going to receive the save the date and promptly forget about it and then be really surprised when they receive an invitation a couple months prior to the wedding. Anyone else have this problem? Do you think it’s too soon for me to send them out?
Too soon for Save the Dates? 1
Here’s a picture of it just because! Smiley laugh

12 Comments

Latest activity by Megan, on January 23, 2020 at 4:30 PM
  • Bryana
    Dedicated April 2021
    Bryana ·
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    They’re beautiful! We are getting married 1/9/21 and are waiting till May mostly because we aren’t doing engagement shots until April May when it’s spring in N.H.! I’d maybe wait until March at the earliest? You don’t want it to far Away is my understanding!
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  • Maggie
    Super April 2020
    Maggie ·
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    Tbh I sent mine almost an exact year early and most people put the STDs on their fridge or home bulletin board so you can send them out now if you like! You may need to remind a few people at the six month mark or so, whenever family get together happen someone will ask me the date again and you remind them then
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  • A
    Devoted October 2020
    A ·
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    If you’re worried about them forgetting you could also send your invites a little earlier as well. I’m sending out invites in February/March for my October wedding instead of sending save the dates
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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    Save the dates aren’t a necessity, so sending them early won’t really do much harm. It’s when you send invitations too early that things start to get sticky.
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  • MOB So Cal
    January 2019
    MOB So Cal ·
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    I agree with Caytlyn that is doesn't really matter, because they are optional to start with. The only downside is that no matter how much you think everything (e.g., date, venue, guest list, etc.) is "locked in" sometimes unexpected stuff happens and you have no choice but to change your plans -- and that gets more complicated once STDs have gone out. I think there were at least two posts last night from one bride who has to change her venue (and therefore her date...) and from another that has to change her date due to unexpected financial challenges. No one thinks it will happen to them, but that's why they are unexpected changes. Also, once you send a guest an STD you are committed to sending them an invitation (unless they truly do something relationship altering). Daughter's wedding was very carefully and thoroughly planned. She sent her STDs about 6-7 months before the ceremony, but at the last minute decided not to send an STD to a few of the "more casual friends" that had been on the list from the very beginning of planning -- she figured they were local and if by chance they made other plans before receiving the invitation, she and FH wouldn't have been hugely disappointed. She was so glad she didn't send those because by the time the wedding was about 3 months away, they realized the wanted to cut some of those people to make room for people they worked with who had not originally been on the list. If she'd sent them STDs, she wouldn't have had that flexibility. I totally get being excited, but there might be longer-term advantages to holding off for a while. They are super-cute though! Smiley heart

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  • Julie
    Dedicated February 2020
    Julie ·
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    I sent mine exactly a year out!

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  • Nikki
    Dedicated December 2020
    Nikki ·
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    Im getting ready to send mine out next week for our 12/31/20 wedding. Because yours (like mine) is so close to New Year's, i think its appropriate to send it out super early. Its around a holiday, so people are going to want to plan early to get cheaper plane tickets if needed, or book hotels early.
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  • S
    Expert October 2020
    Shaina ·
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    I would wait till around early summer time to send them out. I am getting married October2020 and we sent ours in JAN 2020 Smiley smile

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  • Stephanie
    Savvy August 2020
    Stephanie ·
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    I'm having my wedding a few hours away at a state park and have a lot of out of town guests, so I sent my STDs out 10-11 months ahead of time.

    I would say if it will be a lot of planning for the guests, then yes.

    If not, I would wait a few more months so people don't forget about it or lose it, but like everyone mentioned there is no harm in sending them early unless you are not 100% on your guest list or venue.


    All the best! xx

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  • E
    Devoted July 2021
    Emily ·
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    I’d wait another couple months.
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  • Taylor
    Dedicated October 2020
    Taylor ·
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    Very cute, but I would probably wait, only because they could be misplaced by your guests in a little less than a years time. It is hard to hold off when you are excited. But just wait a few more months Smiley smile

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  • Megan
    Beginner October 2021
    Megan ·
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    Unless it's a major travel expense for a lot of guests I would wait. If most of your guests are local it's not a big issue. However being that it's in the middle of vacation time for a lot of people, if you do have family/friends coming from out of state I would say now if perfectly fine as it gives people time to INCLUDE it in their holiday plans versus trying to add it on. But again, if most people already know and are local, this isn't necessary and you can wait a few months

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