Toonie bars?

A toonie bar is still a cash bar. So no. Host what you can afford. If you can't afford a bar, don't have one.

Pay bars even with nominal charge is still a faux pas in my books but do what feels right for you. My parents wouldn't let me have a cash bar unless it was over their dead bodies

Edit: I live in Ontario and that's not a thing here. My FBIL had one at his in Wales and It was simply awful

Do what you can to have an open bar. You'll be a hero in your social group. No charges at weddings.

Every wedding I have been to has been either cash or twoonie. Never an open bar. Majority of people talk too have no problem paying for their own drinks. I am actually doing a cash bar because I can't afford everyones drinking. I am supplying wine on the tables though. If you want to drink more then the wine, it is on your dime. If I payed for their booze intake, it would cost me 3x the food bill. And being at a hotel here, the contract says, serve everything they stock or none at all so there is no chance of serving lower shelf booze and beer only.

I'm in NJ /NYC. I have only seen one cash bar in my career (and I"m going on about 1200 weddings now....). Not all of my weddings are upscale, expensive events; some are low key, relaxed backyard affairs (which I happen to love) with wine, beer and maybe a vodka punch of some sort, but we just don't do it here.

Host what you can afford, but if you're having adults, they're going to want to drink. And not pay for it.

As someone who uses the word tacky on a regular basis, as in, "I can't believe her tacky ass didn't wear a bra w/her tank top to the 3rd grade field trip!"……….the brides-to-be on here should stop using it toward one another! This isn't The Knot, play nice. LOL!

Back on the subject…….only you know what is customary in your area, among your circle of friends. If everyone in your circle does a Toonie Bar, then who are we to tell you it's not ok?

As a guest, if I had a vote to have no alcohol or a cash bar, I'd go for the latter every time.

If that's all you can afford, then I'd be a 'tacky' guest to take issue with it.

If its common in your area, and perfectly socially acceptable, why are even questioning doing it?

I have never seen a cash bar in my life, and would honest to God skip the wedding as a whole before I skipped the alcohol bc its the same thing as skipping food or cake or a dress where Im from. So, I personally think its crazy to earn back $10 per guest or whatever to pay for the alcohol you bought. But I don't live in Canada, and that's not socially acceptable where I'm from.

Here is how I'd rank it.

Open Bar>limited bar>toonie bar>cash bar>Dry wedding

I'm from Vancouver- it's not as common here, but I have family in AB and every wedding I've gone to there has been a toonie bar! I say do it! We're doing an open bar, but we we're very close to having a toonie bar ourselves my only tip is to let people know-- when I went to my first Wedding in AB I had no clue and don't have cash on me , I had never been to a wedding where it wasn't open bar!

JAB, thanks for the lecture but no one used the word tacky in a way that was accusing the OP of being tacky. Why don't you just worry about your own posts rather than telling everyone else what to do. She asked for opinions and she is getting a variety of them. Perhaps you haven't been here very long but it isn't all rainbows - people are often blunt and that's ok, it's usually very good advice.

I have another question…

When people show up, how do they know if it's a toonie bar or a regular cash bar?

Generally it is passed around by word of mouth prior to the wedding. I know the weddings I have been to we have been told a few weeks before by word of mouth or it was on the wedding website.

I have read a few posts now about the issue of a guest being charged for drinks at a wedding. I am in Ontario, Canada and the venue I am using has a stocked bar and bartender for us at no extra charge. However guests are going to have to pay for their own drinks at prices set by the lodge, I have no choice in this matter. There is no option for an open bar or other things, such as a toonie bar. Which I have never heard of, but it is a nice idea. Maybe it's just me, but I don't understand why everyone is so upset about having to pay for their own drinks at a wedding. Open bars are thousands of dollars, which not everyone can afford. My wedding budget is $4,500, there is no way that I could afford to pay for people to drink. If we had gone with my second choice which would have been a soccer/baseball clubhouse, we would have had to get a liquor license, pay for a bartender and supply all the booze ourselves. In which case I would still charge people for drinks to offset all the cost I would have had to put out. Maybe at a cheaper price, something like a toonie bar, but still charge. I don't understand why this is an issue, not everyone can afford such things.

Sorry for ranting on your thread @Hayley, but it's just one of those issues that people shouldn't get upset over.

Ps- If you couldn't tell from my long speech a toonie bar is a fine idea. lol.

Having a toonie bar is just a good way to keep guests from wasting drinks. Not every guest will be ordering multiple drinks and not drinking them all. The manager at our venue highly recommends having one.

I don't understand, Melanie. Your venue has a stocked bar and bartender for no extra cost, yet your guests have to pay for their own drinks at prices set by the lodge? I'm not really sure what that means if there is a cost involved (not being snarky, I just don't understand). Do you have the option of running a tab all night and paying for what has been consumed at the end of the night, or do they require your guests to pay as they consume?

Emily, I'm giving advice, the same as you. If you don't like it, then perhaps you should take your own advice and worry about your own posts.

Hayley, this is not common in California because it's illegal to sell alcohol without a liquor license.

I think people should do what they want to do or are able to do. I've never minded having to pay for drinks as a guest. It's not that much money... unless you're planning on getting drunk. If that's the case, you're probably aren't a very good friend and probably have some growing up to do.

@The Centerpiece Floral Design- Moose Lodge (my venue) is a members club (I am not a member though) that does outside rentals for functions. They have a fully stocked bar on hand at all times and one of their licensed members will volunteer for the night to serve the alcohol to my guests. It is like going to a real bar. They have set prices for drinks, x amount for domestic beer, x amount for premium, x amount for liquor drinks...etc. Just as if you were going out to a bar. My guests will pay per drink so lets say $5.75 for a rum and coke. I can't run a tab for the night and even if I could I can't afford to pay for everyone to drink on the house (open bar). I know the prices seem steep, but at the same time it will also be less likely for someone to get completely hammered and make a scene. With that the bartender will cut people off or throw them out (extreme situation) if they get obnoxiously drunk. Which I'm okay with. I'm not sure if I can, I still have to look into it, but I will do a bottle of wine on the table for guests. After that it's up to them if they want to drink.

I live in Vancouver Canada and Toonie Bars are very common. My FH and I talked at length about the bar situation. We are doing a toonie bar, but we will be serving, basically, unlimited wine on the tables and everyone will get two free drink tickets attached to their name cards. We just want to avoid people drinking in excess and ordering multiple drinks and not drinking them.

Even if we didn't have free tickets we would not be making a profit. We still have to pay for a bartender and his equipment and stock the bar as well as purchase the liquor license and tip the bartender. Maybe if we were charging $4 a drink we would make a profit. Beer/Wine and Spirits cost a lot more up in BC than in the States