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Michelle
Rockstar December 2022

Trend of couple covering all guest costs

Michelle, on February 20, 2023 at 8:06 PM Posted in Community Conversations 0 6
Haven’t seen this in real life but online it seems to be very prevalent as of the last few months. But due to unfounded peer pressure, the couple feels they are fully responsible for covering all expenses of the guests so the guests don’t pay a penny. Going beyond the standard reception expenses to covering transportation expenses, lodging, hair/makeup, attire, and the list goes on. It has gone so far in some online communities to where the couple feels and are told they are inadequate and impolite hosts because they can’t afford the costs for each guest that for millennia prior were the guest’s responsibility and going over budget or into debt to make sure they “do the right thing”. That is not what a proper host does though. But has anyone else noticed trend taking over and not in a positive way?

6 Comments

Latest activity by Paige, on February 28, 2023 at 11:51 AM
  • Cece
    Rockstar October 2023
    Cece ·
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    I haven’t noticed that at all- in real life or online. I know in many social circles it’s customary for the couple to pay expenses of the wedding party, but I’ve never seen it with guests.
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  • C
    CM ·
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    In general I’ve seen the opposite trend, that of brides who think they are entitled to pre-wedding parties such as lavish destination bachelorettes, catered bridal showers, budget breaking dresses etc.


    There is definitely a trend in some circles to host all out of towners to rehearsal dinner and next day brunch. However this and the other items you mention are all totally optional. Traditionally accomodations for any out of town wedding party are supposed to be provided, though.
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  • Erin
    Super May 2022
    Erin ·
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    I’ve mainly seen this when it comes to bridesmaid hair and makeup. In my region, it’s a mixed bag and tends to depend on the bride’s or bride’s family’s budget. I’ve been in weddings where they said “do what you want” and I DIY’ed it all (regretted this but I was just out of college at the time and being careful with money). I was just recently in a wedding where the bride said “do what you want, but if you’d like to use my artists, let me know and I can book you a slot” and I paid to use them because I’m now more established financially and am bad at doing my own beauty for events hahaha. I haven’t been in a wedding where they paid my entire hair and makeup, but know of family members that did that for their own parties.

    For my own wedding, my family graciously offered to cover bridesmaids' makeup, but we left them to do what they wanted for hair. They had the option to use my artist and send me the money to pay the company.

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  • Taylor
    VIP October 2022
    Taylor ·
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    I have noticed a lot of discussion about what to pay for and what not to. We did what we felt was appropriate. We asked our wedding party to cover their attire but we paid for the little details - tie, flowers etc and we paid for hair and makeup because we knew they would like having it done. If any of our wedding party needed help financially with attire we of course would've helped. We also fed our wedding party & parents (and vendors of course) breakfast and lunch day of. But we did not cover hotel or transportation for our guests and we could not afford a dinner or anything for our guests the night before since it was out of town.

    I think it all depends on your budget and what you'd like to cover/ not cover but have noticed people who feel like they need to pay for lodging for family etc

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  • Charlene
    Dedicated November 2024
    Charlene ·
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    I haven't noticed this really. I have some internet friends that are unable to come due to travel costs and they don't expect me to pay for travel. I plan on streaming the ceremony to them

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  • Paige
    VIP October 2022
    Paige ·
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    I think in the UK it's customary to cover the bridal party's attire. I considered doing that as a kind gesture (it's not customary in any of my circles), but my bridesmaids were all different sizes and I didn't want anyone to feel weird about sharing measurements. I paid for everyone's hair and makeup, but I didn't feel any obligation to do so. We also arranged for a shuttle for guests since most were from out of town and had to cover a flight, hotel, etc., and traffic can be a nightmare here. Again, no obligation, but it felt like a nice thing to do.

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