Trouble getting RSVPs for a March/April/May wedding?

That sucks. I’m sorry you’re going through that. This is exactly why we put on the invitations and RSVPs must be in by May 1 or it will be assumed as regrets. A lot of people disagree with this, but at this point dealing with Covid and everything else I’ve had to deal with I don’t care. It’s just a lot easier for me. I do plan on reaching out to certain people, however I’m not going to go out of my way. They are electronic RSVPs and everyone has a computer or cellphone. If they can’t do a simple response then my wedding day must not be that important to them and they don’t need to be there.

Hey Ally!

People may be waiting to see if hey can get vaccinated before then, etc. My wedding was pre-covid and even then I had issues with people responding, close to the due date I reached out to my guests who had not replied and just checked in and reminded them. Some told me they'd mailed it and should be on its way, some forgot and a few legit were lost in the mail. Reach out and give them a quick reminder, let them know you want to make sure you're all set for the day and have a deadline for the headcount. Some people are just super busy too with things opening back up etc.

Good Luck!

Given COVID, I think people are waiting to the last minute to decide so that they can make the most informed decision. For me personally, I would have told you No in January (that's super early for invitations for a May wedding), but right now I would feel much more comfortable saying Yes. When is your RSVP deadline? A lot of couples on here share that guests wait until the last minute, for whatever that's worth.

Lmao yes. Our RSVP deadline was a week ago and I'm still tracking people down.

When is your RSVP deadline? For a May wedding, your deadline should be about a month before, so I wouldn't really expect RSVPs until April, especially with Covid. Even pre-Covid, people typically don't respond until the deadline.

If you send them earlier than 6-8 weeks, they get lost and forgotten. Some people never reply because they don't feel manners apply to them. You will get many replies in the mail on the last day. There's nothing you can do until you follow up the few days following the deadline.

Invites generally are sent out 6-8 weeks prior to the wedding so it sounds like you mailed them out way too soon. Since your wedding is still over two months away, it might be difficult for people to know right now if they can attend because of Covid. Things are constantly changing with the rules so they might be waiting to see what it is like closer to your wedding. Also what is your deadline for RSVPs? You should wait until after the deadline to reach out. We got married Pre-Covid and still had a lot of people not RSVP. Unfortunately, it is pretty common. I have my virtual baby shower this coming Saturday and I had to hunt down people to find out if they were planning on participating. It is just the nature of throwing a party/wedding that some guests wait until last minute or don't reply at all then you have to message or call them.

We just sent ours out for a May wedding and have gotten a few, but I wouldn't expect many replies until April. Even though Covid numbers are going down, I'm sure people are still feeling hesitant to RSVP yes to an event that is still 2 months away.

Unfortunately yes Our RSVP date is next week for our postponed reception, and we’re still waiting to hear back from over half our guests.. And RSVP is online, so it’s not like we’re waiting on the mail. People have told me they’re waiting until the last minute because of Covid etc.. I understand why, it’s just frustrating because so many things are determined by guest count and it’s hard to have a good idea without responses... *sigh* Best of luck and hope everything works out!

The more time you give people to RSVP, the more time they have to forget. What is your deadline?

View Quoted Comment Agree with this, and I also think it's hard to know 2 months out during normal times--people have to take off work, line up childcare, make sure their finances are in order, etc before they RSVP.

Right now I would only attend a wedding if I were fully vaccinated, and I have no idea if that will happen for me by 2 months from now...I hope I am, and if I was, I would attend! So I wouldn’t be able to rsvp yet.


RSVPs are usually due roughly a month before a wedding, so that guests have time to really know their schedules and availability, so if you ask for rsvps too soon, you’ll run into trouble getting an accurate headcount as things change, particularly during covid times. I recommend just giving your guests more time. I understand there’s a number of things contingent on the guest count so it’s annoying to have to sort that all last minute, but it’s the nature of this type of event!

It's too early to expect guests to RSVP for a wedding in May; that's probably why you're not getting many responses. Your RSVP date shouldn't be more than a month out from your wedding. Since your wedding date is May 21, I wouldn't expect responses before April 21. When is your RSVP date?

We've invited a total of 88 guests (including wedding party) to our wedding on 4.24.2021. We've so far received responses for 20 of them via the website. We have asked our guests to respond on the website and are not dealing with paper response cards. Deadline is 3 weeks from now, so I'm not worrying yet. However, I'm noticing that some people seem to think just texting is fine? A friend just said that she and her husband aren't gathering with anyone until they are vaccinated and those they are spending time with are also, so they won't be able to make it. Totally cool, completely understand, but can you please just RSVP no on the site as requested? Especially since we're live streaming the wedding and I'd still like to know if you're planning on watching that so I can send a thank you card! (Sending an RSVP via the site gives a follow up question regarding if they plan to watch the live stream.) But I digress.... Some people are just not great at responding to things. Some people have their response in their head, but forget to actually tell you (I'm personally GREAT at doing this.... oops). Some people are waiting to see what restrictions are like closer to that date or if they might be able to get vaccinated before then. Some people have decided not to come but just really don't want to hurt your feelings (even though you've assured them they won't be) and just don't know how to tell you so they're putting it off. We put a deadline of 1 week before our deadline to get the numbers to the venue/caterers so that we could follow up with those we hadn't heard from by the deadline in that time. Anyone who hasn't provided a response by our deadline to get the numbers to venue/caterers will be assumed as "no" and not accounted for in our final numbers. If your wedding isn't until May, though, you definitely still have some time before you'll hear back from most of your invitees.