Unplugged Wedding Request and Guest Complaints

We are doing this to also the flash messes with our photographers camera cause our wedding will be indoors. Just tell her to Google "wedding photos ruined by cell phones" and look in "images" hopefully she will see how annoying that is and that she can actually ruin your photos! Good luck!

I would just have your fiance talk to her, so it's not uncomfortable for you. He should tell her to be in the moment and not miss it filming it.

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My uncle is a professional photographer and has been doing photography for over 40 years. His work is always amazing, except when it there are other cameras around with flashes. I am really hoping maybe if talking to her doesn't work that maybe he can talk to her as a photographer and tell her that for the pictures to turn out correctly there doesn't need to be any other photographers or camera flashes.

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Hopefully that will work!

Have your FH speak to his mom about being in the moment and seeing him get married through her eyes and heart, and not through the view finder of her phone. I would think if he asks her to put the phone away, she will respect his request. Sorry you’re having to deal with this OP.

I’m going to have my ushers double as device patrol. People can put their phones and cameras away or they can leave. My dad is a photographer and I know firsthand how annoying it is when people have their phones and cameras out during the ceremony. PLUS I do not want a ton of people posting pictures of the kiss before I do. This ensures that.😂😂

Honestly, this should be your fiance's conversation with his Mom. It's tough, but it's his Mom and it sounds like you've made yourself clear. Have him discuss it with a heart to heart, saying how much the two of you would treasure having her full attention which is why you hired someone else. If she's a professional or semi pro photog, I'd throw in "which is why we hired someone else and not you because clearly we would have loved you to shoot it but would rather you experience it as the mother of the groom." I know this seems kind of mushy and over-kill, but she will be family soon and better to have this be the best experience for her than to hurt feelings, no matter how ridiculous she's being. Hope it works out! And hey, keep in mind, she likes you enough to want her pics of the two of you getting married! Sounds like she is very excited for her son to marry you!

View Quoted Comment People are so rude!

My ceremony chapel it is prohibited from taking pictures or having phones out during the ceremony. It will turn a good day into a bad one if anyone ignores that and tries to take a picture.

There's really nothing you can do about this. You have expressed your wishes and now you have to treat people like adults and hope they will be courteous to your request but you can't make anyone follow your rules.

Could you tell your officiant/priest to make an announcement before you walk in? I'm sure he/she could come up with a beautiful way to communicate why it's so important to you and your FH not to have people taking pictures during the ceremony.

If I were in your position, I would ask my FH to talk with his mom. It's completely unacceptable that she's refusing to follow the rules you're implementing in YOUR wedding for which YOU have paid for.

View Quoted Comment Lmnbioooo your comment made me chuckle. Made my entire day!!

View Quoted Comment T was suppose to say lmboooo. I was laughing too hard typing that! Haha

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I agree! they dont have to be rude either and crack a joke about fmil so she would feel extremely RUDE if she doesnt oblige. if there is backlash you can deal with it later. if she still does it - her holding her phone as you are saying your vows can be photoshopped out.

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Doesnt she want to fully enjoy watching her son get married???? maybe appeal to that.

also google a photo of a ceremony with people and their phones and cameras in the way instead of paying attention to you saying vows and solidifying your union and show it to her.. appeal to the fact that if she starts taking pics other people will too....

It drives me nuts when people do that... first of all what if the bride finds the pic you take unflattering??? second what if bride and groom want to share those first... and of course there are professional photographers hired for this specific purpose.... why is it so important to you that you have to have instant photos on your phone or social media of someone else's wedding. i do not get this. you can always take pics w bride and groom after or during the reception...

SIGH

Tell her to give her camera to an usher and he will put the camera at her seat for her so she doesn't have to walk down the aisle with it. And then tell the usher to do no such thing and put it on her seat at the reception like an "ooops". I'm horrible, I know.

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I am having an unplugged ceremony as well. And I think your idea of having people ushered out is perfect. People need to be respectful of the bride and groom. I've seen first hand where people were standing in peoples way trying to take pictures and it looked so tacky. One person even posted pictures on facebook before the bride and groom could. It's disrespectful.

I made the same decision to have no devices allowed during my ceremony so I completely understand where you're coming from. Rather than tell anyone before or have a sign, I just had our officiant announce that our ceremony would be unplugged just before we started which I would suggest you do.

As for handling anyone who already knows and objects, I suggest this. Most of the time the best way to get someone to understand where you're coming from is to put them in your shoes. Have a conversation with your FMIL and ask her about her photos from her wedding. Wouldn't she have been upset if those photos had hands and phones in the way of her face or blocking her groom? The answer is, probably. Just let her know that's what you are trying to avoid. Also, show her some portfolio work from the photographer and/or videographer you hired so she has some piece of mind. You might also tell her that this is as big a day for her, that she shouldn't be worried about capturing on her phone but being in the moment. If you make all these points calmly and with respect, I'm sure she will come around.