Unpopular Wedding Opinions

View Quoted Comment

My take on #3 is that disappointment is more dependent on the personality of the bride or groom than the cost invested. I think you really get what you pay for in regards to vendor choices, and if you're dissatisfied with say a bad day-of coordinator, a more experienced choice was prob not taken due to price. However, some of these sad stories are also rooted on petty family and friends.

But, I agree with you about budgeting and expectations. A $20k discrepancy is undeniable if planning properly.

View Quoted Comment #3! I’ve seen a few I hated my wedding posts lately. As soon as I hear that people are choosing large bridal parties, I think…this is not going to go well.
Simple is better.

It's TACKY AF to make bridemaids and groomsmen pay for the honor of standing up in your wedding. You're honoring them, they shouldn't have to pay for dresses/tuxes/suits/etc in order to be in your wedding. Buy it for them or let them wear whatever.

View Quoted Comment

Lol I'm with you on guest books. They never really made sense to me. So many people don't sign them, have sloppy handwriting you can't read, or just leave a generic message. I love looking back on photos or rereading cards people spent time writing, but I doubt I'm going to care whether uncle Bob signed the attendance list. We MAY do a polaroid guest book or something since they're more personal, but I'm not sold on it just yet lol

Also never understand why couples put photos of themselves as decor at the venue. Like I’m here in the flesh why do you need to see a pic???

View Quoted Comment Totally agree with all of these

View Quoted Comment Yep! They sure do!

We are doing chocolates in a box and they will be placed with each persons name on it in front of where they will be sitting! If they don’t take them I guess it’s more for me 😋 I think the garter and bouquet toss is kind of stupid so we opted out on that 🤷🏻‍♀️

View Quoted Comment I feel this with everyone having a plus one. The only struggle is budgeting 🥲 Numbers added up quickly with more people for us; but this would’ve been great!

I’m not going to share my unpopular opinions for fear I will be unpopular. 😂😂😂😂. I have no thoughts about plus ones. Our thought is if your my friend then your friends are my friends. Also I don’t mind photos of couples displayed on the tables where you’re sitting I think it’s actually quire sweet. I do dislike the bouquet toss and the garter tradition. And for that reason I’m not doing a bouquet toss but rather and gifting potential brides a special gift which are temporary veils wrapped up really nice. I also get a bit a nerved with people who are highly critical of carat size whether large or small. While I’m a fan of larger carats. I do hate how people are very critical of brides that have rings that are smaller in size.

1. Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties.

Why is it ok to pretend and parade around like you are single when you are not. Obviously you are getting married, which likely (hopefully) means you have been in a committed relationship for sometime. Why is it ok to get wildly drunk and go to strip clubs or have strippers?

2. Father giving you away at the alter. I am not doing this, I am walking myself down and everyone acts like I am insane.

3. Vow renewals. Unless done privately it doesn't really make sense to me. You are already married. It seems majorly pointless in the end to me, but I guess let people do what they want to have fun.

4. Random traditions you never heard of until you got engaged and now everyone is telling you something is bad luck. I am refusing to do the night before the wedding away from my fiance. We share a house, and I get horrible (PTSD) nightmares when he is gone. I would literally not get a wink of sleep without him there.

View Quoted Comment Agreed 100% on the bach party drunken debauchery thing.
Also on the father giving away the bride. I'm not doing it either. My father doesn't own me; I'm an adult, giving myself to a union. I'm not property or a child to be handed off.
You do you!! Luck is dumb. Love is what keeps a relationship strong. 😊

View Quoted Comment Strongly disagree…not fun to go to a wedding by yourself!

May I add: Showing photos from parent's wedding and GP's
and 'honoring' them: dad/both parents giving the bride away and even walking her down, giving the moms a gift in front of everyone, parents giving a speech, blessing the meal/ praying before dinner, dances with parents. Because you come for the couple, not the parents/GP. Sure: they are the VIPs guests and the day is important to them, but it's NOT about them. We are skipping all of this stuff.
But I know that this is impossible to even imagine in some cultures, especially those with asian or latino roots where traditions matter more.In my book you have the rest of you life to honor them, including before your big day: attending family gatherings,being there for them when there are 'downs' in their life, spending major holidays with them unless you have a valid reason to skip, gifts at christmas, birthdays, etc...

View Quoted Comment This is a thread for people to voice their unpopular opinions, no need to comment your disagreement- the point is that posters have noticed most people disagree with them 🙂

View Quoted Comment I was pointing out that it isn’t fun to get an invite to a wedding & having to go by yourself…that’s all…no harm done.

A lot of my opinions are based on what we regularly see in our circles and are familiar with.


In no particular order:1) being a guest is a huge honor on its own. Guests don’t need a role beyond that in order to be honored. Let groomsmen act as ushers, let the officiant read the poem you want.
2) bridesmaids and groomsmen should only be the couple’s closest innermost social circle. Siblings and in-laws should not be asked unless they are BFFs
3) for many social circles, a wedding is a family event and that means entire families. Kids do enjoy being able to attend. However if you invite one group of kids, you can’t tell another group of guests that their children are unwelcome without offending anyone. If someone says “no kids” that doesn’t mean that infants and select older children are exempt. If you go out somewhere and a place says “no (fill in the blank” and you do it anyway you will be removed because no one is allowed to do that thing. Same applies to kids at a wedding. In some circles where kids are invited to a wedding as a family event, if they are not included or the couple is selective, they are often blacklisted from future family events.
4) bachelorette parties that require days of PTO and expensive travel where mixed personalities are together in a closed environment need to fade into the sunset. There is nothing wrong with a local night out right before the wedding and those who are scattered around the country can still go because they’re going to the wedding afterwards.
5) a full meal and alcohol are never required for proper hosting. As long as guests attending the ceremony are also served at least some type of refreshments appropriate for the time of day and thanked graciously by the couple, that is proper hosting. Everything beyond that is optional.
6) a guest doesn’t need to know how much the couple spends per person as it is not an entrance fee. In most cases, there is no way they would be able to guess either.
7) not everyone is close to their parents or siblings and they might be closer to extended relatives instead. Inviting “immediate family only without friends” or “invite by circles of extended family but everyone in the circle must be invited or none at all” doesn’t work when you are very close to one relative (cousin, aunt, etc) but have no relationship at all with the rest in the group
8) signs and announcements are largely unnecessary and can be skipped. People generally can tell what is happening around them. They know they are at a specific wedding, they know the couple is, they can tell “this is the gift table, these are the escort cards”. The couple dancing alone or cutting the cake doesn’t need an announcement.
9) if there was a private ceremony with legalities done, that is the wedding. It was chosen to be private for a reason. The optional big ceremony afterwards where everyone else is invited is a vow renewal. They are completely different. It’s disrespectful to those who chose to marry privately and call it a day to say that a private ceremony is not “real”. It’s also disrespectful and fraudulent to the loved ones invited (as well as the clergy performing the ceremony) to the big party who are told that this is the actual real wedding and the legal signing of documents has zero value and importance. If it’s not important, then why not wait for the big wedding with everyone and be honest?

Also, being in a pandemic which hasn’t left should theoretically make people strive to put more emphasis on navigating social situations to prevent/alleviate discomfort and confusion on guests’ part, which is the definition of etiquette. Instead of saying “it’s outdated and doesn’t apply because rules no longer exist due to the pandemic”. Customs and traditions change all the time (things such as garter toss, cake cutting, father giving away the bride, etc) which are seen less and less and don’t have repercussions when they are cut out) but navigating human social interactions is something that we will always have.

It is perfectly acceptable and fine for a bride to choose a bridesmaid's dress, how she'll wear her hair, what her makeup will look like, with little or no input from the bridesmaids. It is her wedding, and those are all small sacrifices. I also think that it is perfectly fine for a bride to insist on a bridesmaid covering up a tattoo, or insisting that the bridesmaid gets (or doesn't get) a spray tan for the wedding.

I don't think strippers are appropriate entertainment for a bachelor(ette) party, at all. You're engaged, you've made the commitment to marry.

I'm not having one, but I think dry weddings are perfectly fine to have. You can go an evening or an event without drinking.

One unpopular wedding option is backyard wedding