Vent: Are you kidding me

Emmy I love you for all the awesome memes you post!

Do keep us updated on what happens. People are being childish, attacking you for your grammar and for your grandma wanting to help out. But some of us are interested in the situation and do want to know how it turns out.

In the future, if you grandma still wants to help, I'd pay the fee myself and then just have her pay me back with the check. That way I know it's paid because I paid it. Good luck.

Aww FMS

@Emmy - Thanks for the great memes!!

regarding checks vs. credit cards - 50% of my vendors requested checks (wedding cake, photographer, videographer, DJ, officiant...). It was scary at first to pay with checks for an event that was 6-7 months away. I wanted the protection of CC but thankfully all of my vendors were wonderful professionals and everything worked out!

I HATE checks. They list your address, routing number and account number. If someone gets hold of your SSN, you could be so fucked.

Bounce a check, overdraft, go into your line of credit, deposit a check which then bounced after you already spent the money.... I lumped it into the same category. We all have an "oops" where we realize we need to take better care of our finances. If you never have, then you must be God.

When I was in college I deposited a paycheck to my bank account and then went and immediately bought my semester's worth of school books assuming the funds would be available right away. They weren't and I had $90 in overdraft fees. I learned.

Good news, everyone! I'm God!!

J/k, but I was taught since elementary school by my parents how to manage my money and I've always been big on saving money so there were times when my family had to borrow money from me when I was only like 10 (only like $20 here and there)! They learned not to ask because I was like a loan shark and would hound them until they paid me back, always keeping a running total. That's why I became an accountant.

Just in case the OP is still around...I remember you wrote on another thread that you're thinking of DIYing your reception food. When you're shopping for another venue, make sure to ask about their policy on that before you take a tour. There are quite a few venues that don't allow home cooked food to be served in their establishments (liability issues).

@MelissaV: I remember I had a paper route and got my first check when I was 13. 217 dollars. My mom took one look at it and said, "Awesome. Now you have the electric bill and the water bill."

/hangs head and deep sigh

@Shelby! OMG at 13 I don't know what I'd do if I was given access to all that money on a monthly basis lol! They would've probably made me pay bills, too. When I was 14 I decided I wanted my first video camera and I spent my entire life savings for one. I still have it and occasionally use it today even though it is very old. On one hand it was totally worth it, and on the other I had to start from scratch again so that sucked. When I was 18 my mother opened up my checking and saving accounts so that helped me get where I am today, paying for my wedding. I guess my wedding is 27 year old me's video camera.

Celia by giving someone a phone call and informing them that a check was bounced and that they are going to cancel the event per their contract then THAT is professional. Telling someone sorry not sorry we already rebooked your date next time don't bounce now give me more money and have a nice life is not professional. I get that it's a business and they have to make their money but vendors often forget that being selected is a great thing because their business will keep going verses being unprofessional and not telling her that the check had bounced and giving her a chance to correct it. I say she dodged a bullet because it is clear that they do not care about anyones wedding as long as someone else is giving them money.

Why should VENDORS have to worry about YOUR checks? Typically, vendors don't even get a notice until weeks after the check has bounced. By then, YOU have gotten a notice from your bank that the check was no good. The check probably came back, they redeposited it and it came back again. That gives you an idea of why it was a month. That is not a giant amount of time, but if that was the trajectory, I can certainly understand why they would cancel the event. Plus, your average venue does in excess of several hundred events a year.

Personally, I try to work with my couples, and hey, we're human. When I get a check back, which is rare, that is exactly what i do; I call them and we fix it, and I don't give my couples' dates away because I know that we all make mistakes. Trying to blame this all on the venue is the easy way out. The responsibility is on the OP.

Bigger vendors/venues don't have time to babysit funds. They have policies and they stick to them. This is how they stay in business. They don't stay in business by pissing of couples and scamming them for 240.00 at a clip. They stay in business by working with couples who partner with them and act responsibly.

I am not saying that anyone should babysit a clients checks. Obviously, not all clients are the same as not all vendors are the same. I do not believe that the OP is guilt free as I stated that it is not something that I would do and she should have paid with her own moeny but I'm saying that the company could have handled it better. You should know that how a company handles situations can make a client for life or a can burn them. What I'm trying to say is that it is not worth going with a vendor that is not willing to work with their clients and takes for granted that someone wants to book them. It seems to me like this venue is one of them. Whos to say that the couple that rebooked doesn't do the same thing then the venue is out of two clients and they only have four months to book the date. It is not a smart policy in my eyes and I'm sure you recognize that since you said you work with your clients. Never did
I say that they are scamming people or that the OP is in the right. Both could have handled this better.

Maybe they did call, but they called Grannie because that's who wrote the check. I feel for OP, but this is business. I don't know of any business owner who would not have done the same thing. On one hand, they have a bad check. On the other, a new client. Cancel the one. Sign up the other.

Hey Bunnylove,

I agree that they could have called Grannie and that would put all fault on OP. Totally not worth discussing this anymore as it seems like i am defending OP and I'm not. I'm just saying they didn't get notice of the failed check and then within the very same ten minutes that it takes to make a call have a couple show up and put the money down. Anyways it is a wedding and hopefully OP has learned her lesson and can find a new venue so she can enjoy her day like we all want.

It's quite professional. It tells me that the venue runs a tight ship. They are an event establishment, not a collection agency. This particular venue apparently has no intention ofchasing down replacement funds for bad checks -- a deposit check, no less. Besides, this was not a surprise ambush. This venue spells out their policy clearly in their contracti. The OP, or anyone who tours that venue, is under no duress when they agree to sign a contract. Just as the venue is legally obligated to provide every service outlined in the contract, so is the client obligated to accept all of the conditions set forth in the contract. It's that simple. Bad customer service is not reflected in a venue's decision to enforce a contractual remedy. Bad customer service is failing to provide the services a business agreed to provide. It's not personal, it's business. As for the lateness of the venue's notification, the OP would have been advised by the bank of the overdraft when it happened. Since the OP is on the grandmother's account, she must have been notified.

Shelby your BAM was posted when I have reporting, no wonder I missed it. You looked amazing!!! Congratulations

Well this thread has gone to hell lol.

Lol Future Mrs Z,

Totally not arguing with Celia or anyone personally so I hope they know that. I'm just trying to encourage the OP to not be so stressed about it and look at the positive. Now she can look closly at contracts and book with someone local or not megasized and corporate owned because they tend to not care about clients and only see dollar signs. Notice no CEOs of hotels or huge venues are on wedding wire.

Okay so I'm obviously late to the party and maybe don't even need to add my two cents but between all of your posts (bounced check for the most important vendor that wasn't even you paying, not wanting to get gifts for bridal party and diying pasta for your reception) makes me think that either 1. You are planning a wedding you simply cannot afford and/or for way too many guests that you can afford.

In all honesty, most of us on this site aren't able to have a "dream luxury wedding" and are paying our own way and sacrificing things to have the wedding we want but that we can also afford with out cheaping out on things that are obviously going to show. You will get no sympathy here on the path you are on.

My advice? Reality check yourself a bit financially and cut guests (and bridesmaids) to start with.