Vent-Is it horrible that I am dreading my wedding?

I felt the same way about two months out - like everything was stressing me out, and that everybody had all these "little requests" that added up to huge hassles, and I'd just become this ogre who said no all the time and grumped to herself.

Luckily, about a month out, I suddenly stopped caring as much and became downright giddy. It was like a bridal Demerol high.

I think what switched things over for me is that I'd realized I'd made everything way too complicated. If it didn't enhance anyone's enjoyment of the day, I skipped it. Nobody notices all those little DIYs and doodads and such, anyway. All anyone wants to do at your wedding is wish you well, have something to eat and drink, dance a bit and catch up with old friends.

I am kind of in a funk today too, except youre much closer to your date...

just wanted you to know im kind of there right now too.

=/

We planned to elope and have a party after. We had told our family of our plans since June. In December we picked our date (April 1st our anniversary). We were about to book our flight and told our families of the date cause we wanted parents/siblings/grandparents there if they could. They FREAKED even though we had been talking about it for 6 months. We then decided to elope and have the party/vow redo on May 25th, but doing both became to expensive and we were forced to do May 25th as a wedding.

You WILL enjoy it that day. Everything will be over, and you'll just be able to enjoy it, BUT I know how you feel. I hated wedding planning. I hated that my wedding wasn't anything like I had envisioned (I gave DH the wedding he wanted).

But that day, it was FABULOUS.

I think it's time to dlegate some things. You want to enjoy your day, you are so close. hand off some tasks so you can relax a bit.

No one is forced to do anything. I hear this all the time; it sounds like you're paying for it, so it's your call.

Thanks everyone...hopefully the funk will pass and I'll get excited.

@Abby-I've actually delegated alot, my mom is doing EVERYTHING for the shower and going crazy buying and making things for the wedding. My fiance's cousin does weddings for a living and is doing all the decorations. She's got a team together for the morning of..but I will have to be there because the lodge we rented is in my name, so I have to be there to show the permit and get it opened up. We will probably do breakfast there while setting up.

We still have to plan the rehearsal dinner...slacking on that.

@Celia..you are right, we are paying for the majority, which pisses me off! My family pressured us to have a wedding and then acted all offended when we asked for help paying for it. My parents are paying for the lodge and cake, and fiance's parents paid for invitations and decorations...so I do appreciate their help. We have to pay for the caterer which is approximately 80% of the total cost of the day.

Its OK, its called the planning slumps. Dont worry, all we want is for you to put on your dress and relax and shine. Just see it as you hosting all your loved ones, and they are all there to love and support you two, and whatever happens as long as you are able to connect with everyone it will be OK!! And then theres us, your WW sisters to support you

I feel you girl. I don't like lots of attention, big groups of people or loads of stress. A wedding is all of those things. But I'm going to do my best to have a good time and not let stuff get to me. I know, it's easier said than done, but I'm sure it will be a very special day for you.

Focus on what's important that day (getting married to your love, while surrounded by friends and family celebrating you) and do what you need to to enjoy yourself. If that means taking a nap during the reception, I vote do it. I have every intention of saying "fuck off" (not literally of course) and curling up in a hammock if I get overwhelmed.

I am in the same boat and was whining about it all last night to my guy. I wouldn't say I am dreading my wedding day, but I think I just want to get it over with already and go on to the honeymoon and move on with my life. I feel like wedding planning is this surreal world of white dresses and centerpieces and I just want to get back to the real world.

Thank you everyone! Glad others fee the same! I feel like everyone expects this process to be butterflies and roses and people give you funny looks when you aren't enjoying it.

We started off planning an elopement because we wanted to spend the money on a ridiculous honeymoon and not on a big ceremony/reception. We were then going to do a small party with each side of the family so they could celebrate. Everyone had been telling us prior to the engagement that we should just elope and when we announced our plans both of our moms freaked and FH gave in to his mom and we are now having a wedding. lol now after we made plans for the wedding people are now switching their minds and telling us we should have just eloped.

I don't really like planning the wedding either. It is so stressful and something that I never wanted in the first place. Since I have known FH I have always told him I never wanted a wedding.

I just have to keep telling myself to focus on the commitment I will be making to my FH and pretend like it is just me and him there. In reality it doesn't matter how the wedding turns out or who is there because at the end of the day you will still be marrying the person you love.

If I had a $1 for every time I've felt like eloping lately...

I've been feeling the same way!!! An acquaintance (sweetly) asked me about wedding planning and little DIY questions. I went home and basically bashed her to FH all like "who does she think she is?" FH thought it was hilarious.

Hahaha so basically I've been grumpy when people ask too. I just feel overwhelmed! I think/hope/pray closer to time I will start getting less stressed and more excited, because at some point, "it is what it is!"

My wedding is a day before yours and I have my moments where I wish I could just forget the whole thing. I think it's normal, after a while it just gets to bee too much.

I'm right there with you!!! Went for alteration consults this week and then was sitting yesterday completely aching from being so tense. And then looking at the budget and how much I still need to pay for and then the realization of SHIT I need to get this money figured out! It's a constant reminder of why I never wanted a wedding. All I wanted was a dress. and now I want to shred that too. That being said.....

Take a day and pamper yourself. Whether it be just a day out having nothing to do with the wedding no thoughts of the wedding or anything or going to the spa or getting a massage.

A friend of mine gave me a gift certificate for a massage and I was planning on waiting until a couple weeks before my wedding to go, but I'm considering going sooner just to escape.

Hopefully we'll all calm down soon. It'll be okay. We'll look gorgeous on our day and then be on to our happily ever after!

I'm further out than you but I've been having similar feelings. I think I'm on decision burnout, I'm just tired of thinking and running things over in my head a billion times. That honeymoon can't come soon enough.

I'm there right now... I made it very clear that I did not want a wedding but FH talked me into it. It is making me miserable. Since we're so far out, we're now researching other options.

Hugs and good luck... it will all be over soon!

Our wedding date is May 14 2022 and I’ve been dreading it for months. I even told my fiancé I didn’t want to go through with it at all. We then talked and I felt loads better. Now I’m dreading it once again and don’t want to go through with it. I have always been a very independent person and like my freedom. I feel like I’m giving all of that up if I get married. The big thing I don’t like is that if things go bad, we have to end it with a divorce. This means spending lots of money and dealing with a lot of crap. By not marrying, we can go our separate ways without any hassle. I’m not very big on being legally bound to someone. I’m afraid to call the wedding off, but I’m just as much afraid of going through with it.

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Holy crap, I've found someone who feels the exact same way. I've just started planning for my wedding next September and every step fills me with more dread at being tied down, because I too enjoy my independence and freedom. How do you feel now? Please tell me it gets better.