Vows- Writing your own versus repeat after me... or both?

I plan on doing both, I've seen both as well. It just seems more personal but you also still have the elements everyone looks for. I saw go for it.

I think we will do both as well

I've heard of people doing both so I don't think there's a problem with that. If I were have done both I would have shortened the traditional vows to the couple sentences I really liked. I don't know if I would have done the whole thing.

We are writing our own repeat after me's. FH doesn't like being the center of attention so he is too nervous to have to say his own. So we are doing it this way but there will be a few slight variations in his and mine.

We didn't do the traditional vows, but I found some on google that suited us better.

We wrote our own and then repeated the lines that we were told we had to in order to make it legal. the repeat after me stuff was sooo awkward.

Probably a mix of both but FH and I have plenty to decide

When a couple wants to write their own vows, I make the traditional vows the question of intent and ask that they reply "I do." That covers the legal requirements just in case their personal vows don't.

Thanks you guys... I like the idea of writing our own vows and then just saying "I do" to a small statement at the very end. From what I've been reading California's laws on what's required for the wedding are pretty relaxed (go figure ) but I like the slight formality of it.

This was really helpful- thank you all so much for sharing your experiences and choices!

We are writing out own vows, then doing a traditional "repeat after me" afterwards. The repeat after me ends with a statement of intent to which we reply "I do." Your officiant should have tons of examples for reference!

We are writing our own, but giving them to the officiant. We'll repeat them after her so that we don't have to worry about remembering to bring our vows, or trying to memorize them, or trying to read through tears in my case.

I think what we plan is to have some sort of line at the end of both that is similar that gives it an "official" tone.Our officiant has lots of examples for us to work from for that part.

I'm doing both as well

FH and I have booked a judge to officiate. We could write our own vows. I don't want to. I want to just use one of the standard choices. I feel like the things that I want to promise to FH are so personal that I wouldn't want anyone else to hear them. Does anyone else feel that way?

We choose:

I --- take you, --- to be my (wife/husband). I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.

You can do both if you like. I'd ask your officiant what they typically say so you agree with it; we haven't EVER included the obey thing.......

FH plans to write our ceremony - including vows (we'll both take the same ones though - which relieves me since it didn't quite seem fair that he's a writer and I'm not). He should really get on that (and getting that tux made) though since we're three months out today!

My husband and I did both It was important to me to write our own vows. And I always like the "repeat after me" steps growing up.