Walk down the aisle

Don't share details with anyone.

My mother will also be walking me down the Isle. I don't know what kind of relationship you have with your FH's family, but I have found it is much easier to just be up front with my FH's family. Even though its not any of their business; doesn't mean they wont voice their opinions and be obnoxious about it. I would talk to your FH about this situation and between the two of you decided how to explain this to his family. There is a chance just because they are traditional doesn't mean they are ridged beyond flexibility. Ignorance seems the be the reason this could cause some animosity between you and your FH's family.

Yep.

My mother refused to come to the wedding because of our invitations, and made her entire family decline to come as well.

While DH's family has some awareness of the issue, we didn't bring it up, and neither did they. (If they do, *that is terribly rude, crosses major boundaries, and your FH should immediately shut it down*.)

Have your mom walk you down the aisle and do your dance with her, and if anyone tries to be catty about it, have one of your BP escort them from the room.

"What I'm struggling with FH family is super traditional. They also don't know our history. If I dont include him they'll see it as disrespectful."

I agree with everyone else that your future in-laws don't get a say on these type of decisions (they literally won't be affected either way!). Definitely don't let them use "traditions" to strong-arm you into things you don't want to do. Traditions vary widely among families, regions, social classes, ethnicities. What is traditional to them has no bearing on you.

I also agree that the best way to deal with this is to share as few details as possible with the people that get no say. Keep all of these discussions between you and your future spouse and make sure you two present a united front. Simply smile, nod, and change the subject if the future in-laws ask personal questions or offer unwanted opinions.