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October 2021

We Eloped, But Now We Want a Wedding.

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Brittany, on October 9, 2019 at 9:53 AM

We were married in September of 2017. It was an absolutely beautiful night with just a small handful of witnesses. (Only 10 people) But now we realize, we really want the wedding we never had. I want bridesmaids and groomsmen, we want to experience the bachelorette party and bachelor party. We want to experience everything we missed out on. Long story short, we had our wedding budget set aside to have our big day, but when buying our home disaster struck and we had to use our wedding budget. So my dear friend helped me throw together a small ceremony because she knew how depressed I was. It was absolutely lovely. But I don't even have any good pictures. I couldn't afford a proper photographer, so an armature friend of mine offered to help for free, but he completely left before taking any good photos. I was devastated. Now to the advice part, since we are already married can we call this a wedding and do traditional wedding stuff? Or do we have to treat it as a vow renewal? Can we have bridesmaids and groomsmen? Can we have our parties? Can we have a gift registry? I'm so confused at what's ok and what's not ok. PLEASE HELP!

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October 2021
Brittany · on October 9, 2019 at 7:04 PM
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Excuse me? I may get kicked out of this forum for what I'm about to say, but I don't even care anymore. Some of you are being absolute (insert word here)! A vow renewal is not a play! It's not fantasy or dress up. You are being cruel for absolutely no f'ing reason. We want to experience a beautiful celebration of marriage with our friends and family and there is nothing wrong with that. It is 100% genuine. I didn't come on here to be judged by brides who think they are better than anyone else. Whooo freaking hooo. Good for you! You were able to have your wedding and celebration all at once. Congrats to you! But not everyone is that lucky. For some of us, life gets in the way and we have to make sacrifices. I'm fully aware that we are legally married and that this isn't a real wedding. I was just simply asking advice on what to call our day and how to go about celebrating it. I don't need you or anyone else telling me that this isn't real. It's real to me and it's real to my husband. End of discussion. I'm so disappointed in these responses. Women are supposed to be supportive of each other. To those of you who were kind and offered real advice, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I will not be reading or responding to anymore comments on this thread.
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