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Beginner July 2019

Wedding after elopement

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Rebecca, on December 18, 2017 at 10:22 PM

Posted in Planning 47

I’ve read a lot of negative comments about this topic and honestly I was really shocked.

We got engaged last Christmas and our wedding is planned for next November. However, we didn’t want to wait until we could afford our dream wedding to get married. I also have two young boys from my previous relationship who we had to consider.
In April we went to the courthouse and were legally married. My now husband began the process of adopting my boys which has just recently been finalized.

Our families are scattered across and outside of the country and at the time there was no way for everyone to make it to a courthouse ceremony last minute. We also didn’t want to include one set of relatives if another set would have to be left out.

We recently let our parents know everything (marriage & adoption) and they understand why. It’s important for us to have the wedding still because we’re both close with our families and our wedding is as much about them as it us.

My question is, or I guess discussion, I just read several brides on here say that it’s fraudulent to have a ceremony/wedding when you’re already married. SERIOUSLY??

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47 Comments

VIP December 2016
WHO? Mrs. Jones · on December 20, 2017 at 8:42 AM
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I had a beautiful courthouse wedding. A year later, (11/11/17) I had a beautiful vow renewal with all of our family and closest friends! It can be done tastefully
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Just Said Yes November 2023
WeLoveOurFurBabies8 · on June 15, 2019 at 10:52 PM
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Honestly, most of these comments are super judgemental. Do what's best for you and your partner, there's really no need for people to feel so upset that you signed a piece of paper a bit beforehand, especially with the consideration of your kiddos and the adoption process. Your wedding is valid, and those who truly love and support your family will see that and celebrate joyously with you! Anyone who doesn't can lose their invitation in the mail
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May 2016
Chelsea · on August 31, 2019 at 8:06 PM
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I have a question related to this. My husband and I are married going on 4 years we had a small wedding and want to have a big ceremony we should have had. Yes we know it’s a renewal. But Because we literally eloped we only had our parents there and didn’t even get to wear my dress. I guess my question is at our renewal can we have a whole shebang? Like bridesmaids my weddding dress the whole 9 yards we didn’t get to have?
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Just Said Yes April 2022
Mrs · on June 1, 2021 at 12:01 AM
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It’s your day, your marriage, your money, your family. Do you.
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Just Said Yes April 2022
Mrs · on June 1, 2021 at 12:11 AM
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I got married in April. Just us and the baby. We wanted people there that were truly happy for us. That being said, we’re having a co ed bachelor party weekend Hang Over style. The bridesmaids and groomsmen will dress up for pics. We’ll have an epic reception. And we’re going to beaches resort for a honeymoon so we get a free wedding there that’ll be a vow renewal on the beach. I’m also having thc infused apps and hourly shots, so hey.

Now the pressure is off, and we don’t have to worry about the planning or family causing drama. Do what makes you happy. Invite the support system you want to support your new family.
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Just Said Yes April 2022
Mrs · on June 1, 2021 at 12:17 AM
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I think courthouse weddings are getting a bad rap here. There’s a chapel you can rent for guests to attend. Obviously not 50+. But it’s not like the DMV geez.
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Just Said Yes February 2023
Josalyne · on April 13, 2022 at 9:34 PM
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So my opinion I am sure will be unpopular, but here goes. A marriage is the legal recognition the court and officiant recognize, hence, a “marriage license”. A wedding is the ceremony, or celebration that one has to commemorate said union. Being that every culture, ethnicity, religion, can have a different idea or way of doing this, I think a wedding is not the same as a marriage. Your marriage is an everyday thing. You are married for the rest of your life, therefore a wedding is a onetime celebration that you choose to celebrate how you wish.

So in my opinion, it isn’t misleading to say we are having a Wedding on a particular day, if that is when it is being celebrated. We celebrate birthday parties on days that aren’t our birthday because of various reasons. I get it they aren’t the same but still very exclusive dates. Also, if people weren’t there to witness the union then what qualms do they have??? Just my opinion.
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