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L
Just Said Yes August 2020

Wedding party

Laura, on October 27, 2020 at 1:22 PM Posted in Planning 0 4
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Please help... advice needed. Last year I got engaged and had a huge engagement party this past January. There i asked several people to be a part of my wedding party (bridesmaids) a total of 11. Reason I asked so many is bcuz my fiancé insisted on having so many bcuz he has a lot of friends he’s very close to. So the whole COVID hit and couldn’t proceed with the big wedding we were planning on having this past August. We decided to have a small intimate wedding with just our immediate family on the scheduled day which was August 7th. We are still planning a big wedding next August at the original place we had reserved. Now, he’s regretting asking so many people to be groomsmen as well as me. Mind you, I hardly talk to these people anymore. Sure I keep in touch within a few but not as often as we used to. What I would like to do is not have any and stick to just one maid of honor and that’s it. What do you all recommend? Also...forgot to mention all their bridesmaid dresses were made and paid for by each girl. I am willing on reimbursing them but I’m stuck on this decision. Please help !!!

4 Comments

Latest activity by Chelsea, on October 27, 2020 at 3:22 PM
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    I mean, we're in a pandemic. No one is keeping in touch as much as they used to, most people are just trying to keep themselves afloat. That sounds like a cop out because you asked all these people to be in your wedding and now want to kick them out because your husband says so. This is definitely a friendship damaging, if not ending, move. You are correct though that you should 100% refund and money that they've spent on your wedding. I guess I'm not really clear on what advice you're asking for, it sounds like you already have your mind made up.

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  • Lisa
    Rockstar July 2022
    Lisa ·
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    I don't recommend removing people from the wedding party, since it's usually a friendship-ending decision. Would these people still be invited to the wedding if you remove them from the wedding party? Do you still plan to be friends with these people going forward? If so, I recommend that you reconsider your decision to remove them.


    If you're definitely planning to remove them, you could say something along the lines of, "As you know, COVID forced us to make a few changes to our original wedding plans, and we got a new wedding date as a result. We have decided to make a few more changes for our new wedding date, and we will no longer have a wedding party outside of a maid of honor and a best man. We will of course fully reimburse everyone for their expenses, and we hope that everyone will still come celebrate with us on our new date." Be prepared for some people to feel upset, and that some of the friendships may be negatively impacted.
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  • Michelle
    Master April 2021
    Michelle ·
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    Totally agree with Lisa. That wording is perfect if you’re planning on removing them. It’s all about presentation. I wouldn’t do this via text- this is either a face to face or a phone call. These are unprecedented times & people are very supportive & understanding given the circumstances.
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  • Chelsea
    Expert July 2021
    Chelsea ·
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    Things have been crazy and if they were close enough to be put in the wedding and already pay for their outfits I would hope you would still include them in your big day. Sounds like you guys should have taken the time to actually decide how important each person is and why they are in your wedding. I would be angry if I purchased my dress and was told I'm out. Life gets busy and these people should be important enough to be at least invited to your day. I agree with Caytlyn.

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