Wedding Planning Arguments

What is your communication like outside of wedding planning? Put the wedding planning on hold until you get the communication figured out. Maybe look into couples therapy as a way to navigate that because something you will do throughout your relationship.

It sounds like he tried to give input at the beginning of the planning process, and you shot him down. It’s often times hard to get men interested in wedding planning to begin with, but I imagine it would be even harder to get them to participate when they have tried and it just led to arguments and his feelings being overridden. You may want to revisit the date of your wedding. I would apologize to him for making him feel as though his desires were unheard and unvalued, then have a non-confrontational conversation with him where you both share why your ideal date is important to you. Be open to hearing each other’s side, and come to a mutual agreement. Another idea might be to ask him what aspects of the wedding are important to him, and let him have the final say in those. For example, if food is really important to him, let him choose the menu. Or if music is really important to him, let him choose the band/DJ. But whatever items you give him, you have to actually let him take control on, and not argue over. Remember, this is just as much his wedding as it is yours, and it should reflect both of you.

View Quoted Comment Outside of wedding planning our communication is pretty good. We normally agree on most things with little arguments. I actually just got him to talk to me and he said he has been stressed because he hears me constantly talking about the wedding and asking his opinion and then his mom is trying to do the same and it's just too much for him. I told him all the things that he has chosen that we are using in the wedding (plate color/style,time of day to start and end, food, and guest count) and it kinda opened his eyes that I have been listening to him.

If he is getting overwhelmed by too much wedding talk, one popular method is to have a set time to discuss the wedding each week/a couple times a week. That way you both know when the conversation is and can be mentally prepared for it, and if it works for you you can both have goals you want to accomplish by the next week (like I’ll research and come up with a list of DJs, you’re setting up our cake tasting).