Wedding vs House Downpayment - Rant/vent

Also should note that I'm saving for both myself...there is some as yet unspecified contribution coming from family, but I'm not counting on it.

I also own a townhouse that I bought just before the last time the market crashed, and I do NOT want to go through that again. I survived but it took me 12 years to get out from being upside down. At least where I am, it seems pretty inflated again, so I may use some house money now for the wedding, and after the wedding is paid for double down saving for the house. Should be able to stick to the same time table for moving, and not have to put the wedding out quite as far as I'd originally feared.

Out of curiosity, what's the rush on selling/finding a house if there is one? Are you thinking the townhouse is too small to start a family? Not in a good school district? Not enough space for your future plans? I think you should first figure out what your timeline is for moving, and work from there. Do you actually want to be landlords? Create an LLC, and deal with renting?

Personally, House trumps all. If it were me, I would use the money towards a down payment on a house, push out the wedding, and make sure my future is set up the way I want. In the end, a wedding is a frivolous expense, a house is not.

My FH and I are getting married in a restaurant. They happen to have a small event space off the main restaurant, so we are having the ceremony there and then the reception in the main space. We will have about double the amount of people you are considering, so renting out an entire restaurant might not be feasible for you, unless it's on the small side. We are also having our wedding on Sunday to cut costs (renting an entire restaurant on a Saturday night was so not affordable!). If you have a restaurant in mind with a small event space, maybe you could figure out a way to use the space for both the ceremony and reception. You could have a standing ceremony (you mentioned casual, so I assume your ceremony will be short) so you don't have to worry about moving chairs (although you could have a few for people who need to sit) and then have the reception in the same space. Only thing you would have to figure out is how to get the tables and chairs set up for dinner. We struggled with what to do with money we got from our parents too. I was also never one who dreamed about my wedding since I was a little girl, but we both knew if we didn't do the wedding, we would regret it. We are keeping some of the money to either save up or use for the honeymoon.

My FH and I were given the same option by my mom. So I've decided to pay for the wedding myself and my mom is going to give us a down payment for a house. If you think you could afford a small wedding and use your mom's money for the house, I'd go with that option. A house is going to last longer than a wedding.

Thanks so much everyone! I am really thinking of trying to get away with a small restaurant wedding. The place where I am thinking of does have private rooms so maybe they will be able to move some space aside for a standing ceremony, as long as the ceremony is short enough.

I am very grateful that my mom is willing to either put the money towards a house or a wedding. Even though we are not looking to move anytime soon I do think it would be better to save that money aside so that when we are ready we will know what we are working with.

I wish there was a better way to tag you all so that you knew for sure that I read all of your comments but I did! I appreciate the time you took to reply to my post 🤗🤗🤗

I vote parks! I love park wedding. Also, get Silver Diner to cater. I happen to know that Chef Ype takes it as a great compliment when asked to be a part of family events like this.

Tough call..... I am spending less bc we are saving for a house....