Welcome Party for Out of town guests

Yes if you’re hosting something you need to pay for it. You definitely need to pay for the rehearsal dinner but a welcome party isn’t necessary if you can’t afford it. Sometimes people say “hey we’re gonna be at this bar at this time if you want to stop and say hi” to out of town guests, but it should only be by word of mouth.

If you’re hosting it then yes you have to pay for it. I say do either the rehearsal dinner or the welcome party. Not both. The night before the wedding can be extremely hectic and planning both can get a little expensive.
I skipped rehearsal dinner and just had a welcome party since it was a destination wedding. We stayed at an all inclusive hotel so we just had a private area at buffett and everyone met there for dinner before the welcome party but it wasn’t the formal rehearsal.

The welcome party would probably be 4 days before the wedding because that’s when my parents and family would be flying in and I don’t want to make them feel like I’ve just ignored them until they’re showing up for the wedding.

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Exactly this. A welcome party can also be pretty casual, it doesn't need to be in a nice restaurant. You could look for burgers and beer type place or a hall, or even ask your venue or hotel for suggestions for other options.

We did an informal ‘meet us for drinks’ pre wedding event spread by word of mouth (since we were not covering costs) and it was actually considerably less attended than we expected. Looking back, I probably would have just skipped it. You have enough to plan with the wedding. And your guests might want some free time to enjoy the weekend besides the wedding festivities. 🤷‍♀️

If you’re hosting you need to pay.
Most of our guests are Out of Town. So we wanted to include everyone so we have another chance to see them. To make this work with our budget we found a small casual rental space. Check with whatever hotel you have your room blocks through, they have conference rooms you can usually rent out for pretty cheap. We will be ordering pizzas and providing beer/wine. Much cheaper than a formal dinner out. Plus then we can walk around and mingle with everyone.

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If it's truly a party, then yes, I would expect the bride and groom to pay. We are having a casual "we will be in the hotel bar if you want to stop by" after our RD. I'm only mentioning it in the welcome pamphlets.

That would be a good idea too. Thanks!

I am also from a small town and we are doing a "Bride and Groom will be at X Place from 7-10pm stop by and say hello and have a drink!" after the wedding rehearsal. We went to a wedding in Portland ( I am from CA) and they did this and we LOVED it. We got to show up however and at whatever time and it was a given we each covered our own as nothing was reserved and was after dinner hours. It also gave the Bride and Groom an excuse to exit and anyone who wanted to stay longer could. The place we went to was this trendy but very casual bar in Portland.

We are totally copying it and have chosen a bar in town that has a patio and are bringing in a few pizza's because I just love to eat. We figured there's plenty of time to be all fancy at the wedding. We didn't want someone else to be stuck with the cleanup days or day before the wedding. Low key, low cost, able to catch up, casual, and an exit strategy was important to us. There's resting to do!

I asked my wedding planner about this. We are having a destination wedding in Hawaii (in just 2 months!) and we are not inviting everyone to the rehearsal dinner. She recommended having a welcome party after dinner hours at one of the Mai Tai lounges over looking the ocean. We thought this was a great idea! We will be hosting the drinks and maybe have some appetizers for people. But we are going to say- Come have a cocktail with the Bride and Groom, our treat! Or something like that. We figure they spent so much money flying out to Hawaii that we should pay for their drinks. But again, it is completely contingent on ones budget. Our wedding planner said it doesn't have to be formal at all and some people do have barbecues etc... It is just so people can meet before the wedding for us to see our friends and family we haven't seen in a while. BUT we are two months out and still haven't booked anything yet. But it is on my list. haha