What Makes a Wedding?

This is such a personal question. For me, it was neither of those things. It was us finally being able to stand up in front of our friends and family and promise forever to each other.

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Hi Sarah, thanks a lot. Congratulations!

I don't think it's anything specific. Yes the venue plays a part, as does the food, music, dress, etc. Its the sum of the parts put together. What makes a wedding? It's such a deep question but I think it comes down to guests feeding off of your vibe. If you're happy they'll feel it and feed off it. Don't change your vision for anyone. All of the pieces need to be authentically you and your fiancée.

I feel like its the fact that you are finally getting married to your best friend/love of your life/soul mate what ever word you want to use. You are saying you will be there for each other. The venue dress food etc is all wonderful but to me the important part is getting married to the person I want by my side for the rest of my life.

For me it's definitely the ceremony. If you had all the other elements but didn't make legal vows before each other and your guests, then it would just be a party, irrespective of how nice the venue might be, or how bridal the dress was.

I mean I would be really sad to get married without an actual bridal gown, because it's something I've looked forward to and dreamed of for a long time, (and understandable if it was the venue or some other element someone felt this way about!) but if it was the only way we could get married, I'd totally just wear a pretty white frock from ASOS or something - I'd be no less married, you know?

A wedding is by definition the legally binding act of becoming spouses. Covid has not changed that even though many feel it has. That is the same whether you choose a simple courthouse ceremony with 2 witnesses an wearing tshirts and jeans or a full blown event with 200 guests dressed up. Some people say that a ton of guests and dressed to the nines with all the bells and whistles is what makes a wedding and what is required to be married and the legal paperwork means nothing beyond aesthetics. As well as the belief that getting married and having a wedding are two completely different things, which they are not. You can call a potato a strawberry all day and it won’t change the fact that it’s not a strawberry. That is actually disrespectful towards those who don’t want a large group attending and don’t care about over the top fancy that what they have chosen is not a “real” wedding.

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Absolutely! A blissful day to share with family and friends.

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I personally don't think it's disrespectful in any way. I had a courthouse wedding the first time around. I liked I had started both of us have been down this road before. I was married for 22yrs and his was 18 yrs. All of our kids are grown and we both have made the sacrifices to come to this place in our lives and relationship. We both know that it's going to be a wedding for our guests but to the both of us it's a comment to God and us. However, bringing in the family and friends and signing legal documents is just a way of society. To me and him it's God first.

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Absolutely!

The ceremony makes a wedding.

Not its décor, not the venue, not the dress you wear.

The ceremony that binds you two as a married couple is what makes a wedding. It's why a courthouse wedding is still a wedding. It's why a backyard wedding in your jeans is still a wedding.

The ceremony 100% everything else is secondary in my mind.

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Thanks W-K!

View Quoted Comment For myself it's this! I've waited 6 years ( it will be over 7 by the time we say I do). But he is a man worth waiting on to be ready. Well now we both are, and that's what makes it for me.

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Well said!

For me it was just celebrating with our familes. My husband is 20years older than me and this was his first wedding, too, so EVERYTHING made it a wedding for him.

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Thanks, my love!

Of course the ceremony is all you need to make a wedding, but if you ask what’s the most important/best part… for me it’s the venue! When we found ours, I teared up realizing that’s where I wanted to say my vows and celebrate with family & friends. For guests, they care most about good food & drinks, and being comfortable (not too hot, not too cold).

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I totally agree with you cause at that moment and time it's like a magical feeling your eyes light up and you wear a kool-aid smile. Thanks, Pirate & 60s Bride.