My brother is a gay man, nothing wrong with that. Sadly our parents did not take it well and it took a long time for them to realize there is nothing wrong with his brain, it is just who he is. My brother has always held a bit of a grudge against my parents for treating him poorly when he came out.
I have always been supportive of him and pre-pandemic he had a boyfriend who was bad news. Red flags were dropping all over the place. But he was in love and didn't see it. Eventually though he did see it and after a big battle he finally left him. This man was abusive both emotionally and physically. He took advantage of my brothers money, car, and other things he owned. This man lied and refused to let my brother come home to visit (3 hours away) calling him a pussy for being home sick. He got angry drunk all the time and bad mouthed him. The list is endless.
Well we were all happy he got out of that place, but just a few months ago my brother called to tell me that he got back with him. Telling me he changed, and quit drinking as much, he is back on medication and is seeing a therapist. Honestly this guy was awful and I don't think people can change that drastically but I want to be supportive of my brother. Well its almost wedding time, my parents DO NOT want this boyfriend at the wedding. And my husband (we eloped last year) really does not want him there either. Honestly I don't either but I don't want to upset my brother. He has said he will still come but to be warned that this is the last family event he will be coming to until this boyfriend is welcome.
So what to do? Suck it up and let him bring his boyfriend and just have them sit at a different table than my parents? Respect both my parents and husbands wishes and not let him come? I don't want drama and we are having an open bar. If this man can't control himself around alcohol I don't want a disaster.
