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mrswinteriscoming
VIP December 2021

Where should we have our ceremony? Same venue or different to reception?

mrswinteriscoming, on February 23, 2021 at 5:55 PM Posted in Planning 0 16

I have decided to proceed with the large, formal wedding I originally planned for my wedding on 12 December 2021. I would love some input as to whether I have my ceremony in the same location as the reception or not.


Same venue: Our reception space is a grand Victorian ballroom with a small adjoining bar area. If we have the ceremony there, the room will be set up for the reception (tables moved slightly aside in the centre) and 60 chairs and an aisle set up (110-120 people expected). During cocktail hour, people will be ushered into the bar area to put the room back in place for the reception.

PROS: indoor, all in the same venue CONS: some people will stand, not convenient to shuffle everyone

Different venue: the alternate is to have our ceremony in a beautiful garden of a Georgian manor house. If the ceremony is there, it will be outdoors (early summer time), there will be sufficient seating for all, however may be a little uncomfortable for guests being formally dressed (although grass is not an issue as there is a tiled ‘aisle’ people can use to access their seats.

PROS: more seating available, no shuffling around CONS: outdoors (wet weather option available) and involves travelling to reception later (35min drive)

Moving our ceremony to a different venue will cost us about $3,000 more – we would also supply guests with bottled water and fans since it would be outdoors. Moving our reception to a venue with a ceremony space is not an option.

If you were a guest, what would you prefer – same venue or different venue?

16 Comments

Latest activity by Lady, on February 24, 2021 at 10:25 AM
  • S
    Expert November 2021
    Sara ·
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    IMO while neither of these options are ideal, if you had to choose I'd go with option #2 (different venue). More important for every person to have a seat during the ceremony!

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  • Paige L.
    Super September 2021
    Paige L. ·
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    Definitely option #2. No one should have to stand through a wedding ceremony.
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  • Michelle
    Master April 2021
    Michelle ·
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    Option #2- you need to have chairs for everyone. I’d be extremely irritated if I came to a wedding, all dressed up & no place to sit.
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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    Every person having a seat is the most important, so I would go with that. However, why can't the venue just set up for the ceremony and then flip the room while your guests are in cocktail hour? For our wedding, we were supposed to have an outdoor ceremony, but it was about 102 degrees that day, so we decided to do the ceremony indoors in the ballroom, which was where the reception was. The venue set the room up for the ceremony, ushered everyone out for the cocktail hour, and then set the room up with tables for the reception. Most venues should be able to flip a room within the cocktail hour very easily.
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  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
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    I would go with option two. None of your guests should be expected to stand during the ceremony.
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  • Hanna
    VIP June 2019
    Hanna ·
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    Option #2. Every butt needs a seat Smiley shame

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  • mrswinteriscoming
    VIP December 2021
    mrswinteriscoming ·
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    The room will be set up for the reception but pushed to the side for the ceremony. Being a historic building, the only way into the ballroom is via the bar / foyer (where cocktail hour will be) so staff wouldn’t be able to completely re-do the entire space since there would be no discreet place for them to go to bypass guests. At the time of booking the venue I didn’t care much about having the two in the same location, it is just that the more I’ve thought about it the more I think it would be ideal to have them separate I think.

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  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
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    That's really tough. I agree with everyone else that if you can't provide a seat for everyone to witness the ceremony, then that space does not work for your ceremony. But I don't do well in the heat (especially in formal wear), so any outdoor wedding that has the potential to be so hot that water and fans are needed would definitely not be my preference either.

    Driving 35 minutes between ceremony and reception is fine, and in general, two venues doesn't bother me (it's quite common where I am from). It's just that neither of your ceremony options is ideal. Can you find a third ceremony option (indoors)? Or maybe reduce the formality of your wedding. If you don't require evening wear, then an outdoor ceremony would be less of an issue.

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  • Michelle
    Rockstar December 2022
    Michelle ·
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    Unless your ceremony needs to be in a house of worship to be recognized, it's easier on guests to keep everything at one venue.

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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    Ahhh yeah, in that case you definitely should have the ceremony in a separate place. Every person getting a seat is really important, especially for a formal wedding.
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  • mrswinteriscoming
    VIP December 2021
    mrswinteriscoming ·
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    I tried to find indoor venues but where I am the only indoor ceremony only venues are even further drive away (by quite some distance) or are quite corporate type spaces.

    We will be doing it in the early afternoon (around 4/4:30pm) so once the heat of the day has started to settle down and will ensure we've got some fans and water available for everyone to help with it.

    Was initially black tie (every other component of our wedding is) so we would make it formal to ease things.

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  • M
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
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    That’s tough because obviously it’s convenient to have everything in one venue but at the same time a half hour drive isn’t that bad but that is kind of a lot to add to your budget if you don’t have it
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  • Ava
    VIP May 2022
    Ava ·
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    I would definitely go with option number two. Especially if you are having a formal event. There is nothing formal or high class about having people stand during the ceremony.
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  • Shirley
    Expert November 2020
    Shirley ·
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    I think not having enough seats at the reception venue is the nail in the coffin on that idea. Asking half your guests to stand for the ceremony is too much. If your guests are formally dressed, that could be quite uncomfortable also
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  • Samantha
    Expert October 2021
    Samantha ·
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    Eh, I'm the outlier here. I don't think it's a big deal for me as a guest to stand for the ceremony. Though couldn't you just have everyone sit at their tables and have only a few seats up front for immediate family? My Cousin did this and it worked out nicely. I would not spend an extra $3000 on a ceremony space.
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  • L
    Lady ·
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    You need enough seats for every person. That's a non-negotiable. So in that case your only option may be the separate venue. Although I agree with PP, why couldn't you just have the tables set up normally at the reception space and just get married up front?

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