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Dedicated January 2014

Why don't people RSVP!?

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Kathleen, on December 6, 2013 at 1:08 PM

Posted in Planning 28

I just want to complain. My invite list is 165 people, but my target # is 145. However, looks like I will have a fun wedding of 22 people. I am SO tired of people saying, "well, you know I will be there!" NO, IDIOT. I put the stamp on the invite, walk your ass to your mailbox and put the RSVP in. When I tell my caterer a #, I now have to rattle off how I just "know" so and so are coming. It makes my life 10x easier, to grab the RSVP's and count them out instead of remembering/assuming the #.

Where is wedding etiquette? It is NOT hard to circle a "joyfully accepts" or "regretfully declines"...the stamp is already there. I think it is unbelievably rude. I know you are all thinking, "geez, she's a b#tch, I wouldn't RSVP either." hahaha However, that is why I vent on here...before I have to go to Facebook.

I do not want to chase people down to ask them "are you coming?". YES or NO. I'm getting married in 36 freakin' days and need an estimate other than "Of course we'll be there"

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28 Comments

Expert December 2013
Jackie · on December 6, 2013 at 4:27 PM
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I feel your pain eight days out. Thought we had everyone in order after calls and facebooking, but i talked to my grandma today and apparently 10 of my cousins are no longer coming. I already gave the final count, which isnt allowed to decrease, so now we have to pay for those ten people or find ten randoms to take their places. I am livid.
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Dedicated October 2014
TeeToGee · on December 6, 2013 at 4:27 PM
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Send out a card to everyone who didn't RSVP saying something like, "OOPS! It looks like you overlooked your RSVP to our wedding! You still have time to stay on the list. Please RSVP by xx/xx/xxxx to ensure your seat." Yeah...right....
That's what I send to customers who are late paying their bills...with accounting wording instead.
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Dedicated November 2013
Natasha · on December 6, 2013 at 4:41 PM
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Split up the list based on whose guest they are. FIL called a ton of people because his family didn't RSVP. And those that did, didn't show up. RSVPs will be a hassle, but you get through it and enjoy those who are there. We had 12 people not show up (4 we counted but didn't really count on being there because of illness an age) and I can't let it bother me. There are so many people who come and just want to celebrate with you. People who love you a whole lot more than you know. Just spread the work, get your responses any way you can, and be ready to celebrate.
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Devoted July 2014
MrsKtoB · on December 6, 2013 at 4:57 PM
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You're not a bitch, I refuse to accept verbal, text or email RSVP's. In the event someone did not receive or loses theirs prior to the RSVP date and they contact me I will include them in those instances. I will not take any RSVPs after the date!! If they show up and didn't RSVP they won't have a seat and won't have a plate to eat!! Most think that's pretty bitchy. I'm thinking 22 RSVP's would save me some money LOL!
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Expert October 2015
Future Mrs. Haley · on December 6, 2013 at 4:59 PM
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I feel like a lot of people are "dumb" to the actual importance of RSVP's until they plan an event themselves.
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Expert January 2014
Julie · on December 6, 2013 at 5:12 PM
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These people are killing me 2!!!! Omg respond! And for those who do stop adding your uninvited plus 1
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Beginner October 2019
samantha · on August 9, 2019 at 12:57 PM
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Omg girl I am going through the same thing, I just don't understand. Its not that difficult, we even provided the stamp. Be a forking adult and RSVP! My invite is over 150, and we haven't even received more than 30 back.
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Just Said Yes January 2023
Rachel · on July 10, 2023 at 3:43 PM
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This is my situation too, and i'm so sad and frustrated about it. i'd say 50% of people RSVPd to my wedding. the others i had to chase after and even then they didn't "officially" RSVP, they'd just say "count me in" over a text message. this isn't a keg party. i'm spending tons of time and money on this. don't be rude.
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