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Savvy May 2021

Worth eloping?

Victoria, on October 13, 2020 at 4:35 PM Posted in Wedding Ceremony 0 11

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Hi, so to start my wedding is in May 2021. I live in Oregon that still has really strict COVID restrictions and I don’t see them letting up anytime soon. My first worry is that my wedding is indoor and due to my large family we will barely be able to invite anyone that isn’t family plus hard to have a dance floor where we have to be 6 ft apart.

My next problem is my SIL and matron of honor has a baby due the week after our wedding. It will be the first grandkid for my parents and I’m worried her giving birth could interrupt the wedding. We also have a groomsmen that’s wife is due a couple days after the wedding ( that one being less of a worry).
Because of the covid restrictions I don’t see being able to move it up to feb-April without the restrictions still being strict. Which would solve the babies being due in the week of my wedding but not necessarily the covid restrictions.
I need to book the rest of my vendors, I have the venue and photographer but don’t want to lose more deposits having to change my wedding. I’m thinking at this point the best would be just to elope. I think I might be over thinking but am a planner and don’t like this waiting period.
Also my fiancé and I have been together for over 5 years and don’t want to wait later to get married. The May date was the latest either of us wanted. Any advice? Do I just need to chill tf out?

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Latest activity by Shelly, on October 14, 2020 at 9:36 AM

VIP May 2020
Jai · on October 13, 2020 at 4:50 PM
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Def come up with a plan B! If the restrictions dont let up, then maybe have a small intimate ceremony then do a bigger vow renewal later if you want ! with covid it's so important to have a plan B
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Expert September 2022
Allie · on October 13, 2020 at 5:00 PM
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I agree that it’s smart to think about other options! It’s such an awkward, stressful time to be planning a wedding...no one knows if they’ll have to undo and redo all the planning at a moment’s notice! Perhaps one option would be to have an outdoor minimony with just immediate family in the March-April timeframe, and then delay the larger celebration? I know many women give birth before their due date, so it’s possible your SIL will have a newborn on your intended wedding date (and therefore unable to come). Just throwing out some ideas!
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Master April 2021
Mrs. Spring · on October 13, 2020 at 5:10 PM
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If getting legally married is more important then I recommend you elope.
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Savvy May 2021
Victoria · on October 13, 2020 at 5:19 PM
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Thanks for your input. It’s less of legally, we don’t care if the government recognizes it but just to finally be husband and wife. Our main reason for the actual wedding was a party with friends.
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Savvy May 2021
Victoria · on October 13, 2020 at 5:20 PM
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Thanks! I’m beginning to think we might need a plan C as well!
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Expert September 2020
· on October 13, 2020 at 5:24 PM
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I dont think youre overreacting, it sounds like you have a lot going on. Eloping seems like the best option because you havent booked all your vendors yet. I feel like the best solution for anyone right now is to elope on your original date and move the big party 2022. There are just so many unknowns
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Savvy May 2021
Victoria · on October 13, 2020 at 5:24 PM
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Thanks for the advice! Would you still do a ceremony if you did the minimony or reception only?
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Expert September 2022
Allie · on October 13, 2020 at 5:37 PM
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Of course! And yes, I personally would! I know it’s not traditional, but nothing about 2020 seems to be traditional! I personally think there’s something really beautiful about two people declaring their love and commitment in front of their loved ones via a ceremony....first, with just immediate family...second, with all loved ones (whenever it’s possible due to scheduling and the pandemic and all that). Personally, I had a small family-only minimony in the backyard already... and I am looking forward to reciting those same vows in front of our larger communities. And the symbolism of the 2 communities becoming 1 community...and all our loved ones “sending us off” into married life, ya know? I am also thinking about revising the 2nd ceremony vows just slightly to say something like “I am so glad I married you on such-and-such date...I am glad to be re-affirming my commitment to you today in front of all our loved ones...and I would marry you over and over every day, if I could!”
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Super September 2020
Alli · on October 13, 2020 at 6:15 PM
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I would also want to get things figured out which is so hard right now!!! Best wishes 🤍
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VIP May 2020
Jai · on October 13, 2020 at 7:06 PM
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I think that's a good idea!
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Devoted January 2022
Shelly · on October 14, 2020 at 9:36 AM
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I'm not a huge fan of elopements, but our close friends are doing it in Hawaii! They found a agency/company that takes care of everything for them, then they are having their honeymoon there. When they come back, they plan on having a big celebration/reception with everyone.
I think it's nice to elope, but I also think it's easier to have everything taken care of in one day, as opposed to eloping, then coming back just to plan another big party with everyone. Def. come up with a plan B, and C if you have to!
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Worth eloping?

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