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~Jessika
Savvy August 2009

wow I have no friends!!!

~Jessika, on June 1, 2009 at 11:41 AM Posted in Community Conversations 0 11

So my wedding is in 89 days and all of my so called friends have backed out of being in the wedding party!!!! Does a wedding make everyone realize who their friends are? What do you do when your wedding party has decreased so drastically compared to your FH's and the only wedding party you end up with are your sisters and family?!?!?!!? Why do weddings bring so much drama?!?!?!

11 Comments

Latest activity by Future Mrs T, on June 2, 2009 at 5:20 AM
  • soccrgrl05
    Dedicated June 2009
    soccrgrl05 ·
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    Well, did they have reasons to? If they were not that important reasons then forget them. If they don't even want to be part of the wedding then forget them. Still be gracious and invite them, you don't want any more drama. Just keep asking around. Ask your FH if he has any girl family members he wants in the wedding. A wedding brings up drama (according to me) because it is a life altering day for you, and you are asking people to be involved, some people don't like weddings. Some people don't want to move their day around. Also with the wedding being so close, like I said, just start asking other girls.

    Good luck!! I hope you find some trustworthy friends to help.

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  • ~Jessika
    Savvy August 2009
    ~Jessika ·
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    No they didnt have good excuses, some started fighting with others and took themselves out because of that, one said she was worried something would come up the day of the wedding and she wouldnt be able to show up so she dropped out, and one said this morning after 5 months of knowing when she needed to buy her dress that she cant afford to get a dress so she's just taking herself out of the wedding!!!

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  • A
    Devoted August 2009
    amc ·
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    Ugh that sucks. I realized I had no friends when I first went to select my bridesmaids, and only had one girl that I really trusted and was close to. I don't have any sisters so I felt really lame and my FH had 3 or 4 people he wanted on his side. I ended up picking a couple of my guy friends. One of them thought it was weird at first, but after he found out the other was in it too he was okay. Guys are much less drama, so maybe that is an option?

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  • Chelsea
    Dedicated September 2009
    Chelsea ·
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    Wow! I am very sorry to hear about all the drama you are dealing with. I have witnessed this on my fiance's side. He has had friends back out, not return calls to order the tux and just generally say yes to be in the wedding and then have been unreachable since! Not to mention his brother is in the Coast Guard & recently found out he won't likely make it back in time. I know his friends behavior has lead to him feeling betrayed and like his 'friends' don't really care about him and then he was bummed about his brother since we can't change the date.

    Our solution was to take the pressue off having 'equal' sides (which kills me since I have a little OCD esp. when it comes to this wedding...) But once I took the pressure off finding someone he ran into an old friend and asked him outright. This got him excited about it.

    I would try to roll with it & don't let it affect how wonderful your day will be. If you have some other friends you didn't realize you would have asked try them?

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  • Chelsea
    Dedicated September 2009
    Chelsea ·
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    Sorry.... to finish the above

    It sucks that you have had so much drama, but if you let yourself off the hook and do what you can with the people who have stuck by you your day will be fabulous!!

    Best of luck with everything!

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  • L
    VIP August 2009
    lauren10 ·
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    We have the same wedding day...I didn't realize it was only 89 days away....yikes!!

    Weddings bring drama when people are so self-absorbed they can't set aside their stupidity for 1 day just to make a friend happy. screw 'em. It sounds like your family is sticking by you...that's all you need. You'll make so many new friends throughout your life too, people that are in the same place and stage in life as you... and you'll have more things in common with those people than just "the past".

    Cheer up...it might be a blessing in disguise that these b*tches dropped out!

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  • Amanda
    Beginner June 2009
    Amanda ·
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    We are not having equal sides. I have 3 Brides Maids and he has two grooms men. It is a small wedding party- just my best friends. Also, to make it easy I just told them to buy any brown dress- that way it is not expensive for them. Maybe you can get that one back by letter her get any dress, help her find an inexpensive alternative on-line maybe.

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  • J
    Just Said Yes October 2009
    Jenn ·
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    Weddings do absolutely bring out the drama! I actually feel the same way in some respects but am now wondering why I didn't just keep it to family due to some unexpected issues (but no backing out as of yet). This really may be the best thing in the long run. You don't want anything arising on your day to take away from you and your excitement for this great step! If you're stuck on even sides...I agree, mix it up...boys on either side is ok now (girls too). ;o)

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  • ~Jessika
    Savvy August 2009
    ~Jessika ·
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    My original maid of honor was a guy, my best friends since I was 9 years old. Unfortuantly he cause more drama then the girls did!!! All the girls have different dresses just in the same color so the money wasnt the issue I think it was just an excuse to not be in it and not have any responsibilities to have to worry about!

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  • ruth
    Expert July 2009
    ruth ·
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    I am so sorry that you are going thru this. I think some people don't know how to be happy for others. My wedding party is mostly just family memers. My MOH is my bestfriend. so at least you know who is on your side and you can always count on family.

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  • Future Mrs T
    Dedicated May 2016
    Future Mrs T ·
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    Wow that toatally sucks! but it will all work out. i am just having my sister and my fh is having his 2 best friends. i am having my sister be escorted down by both of them and then having 2 flowers girls to equal it out...

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