Writing your own vows or not

We will be.

Why doesn't he want to? Can the two of you work on them together?

We're going to. We want our vows to describe our relationship and the specific commitments we want to make to one another.

There are a lot of guides on Pinterest to help write vows, if he's nervous and doesn't know where to start.

We're not. I love the Catholic vows. We're both baptized, but we're not having a Catholic ceremony. The vows will be our little touch of Catholicism.

FH wants to, so we will be doing it. I started a rough draft but I keep crying before I finish saying them lol....still working on it.

A simple template I offer to my wedding couples goes like this:

1. How they made you feel when you met.

2. What your relationship grew to become.

3. Your vow to be their spouse.

Just one or two sentences describing each and you're done. Your officiant should be able to help you. If any one needs specific help from me don't hesitate to ask.

We're a little more private about gushing feelings, so we opted to use traditional vows and write each other a love letter to read the day of. The letter is also in lieu of a gift.

I wanted to really bad, FH doesn't want to so we aren't

We're going with traditional Irish and Scottish vows. Neither of us feel comfortable writing our own.

I'm writing my own vows, but that's because I'm a huge nerd and wanted to include references like, "It's dangerous to go alone so I will always be by your side." or "I promise to love you, Always." See what I did there?

You could potentially write your own and your FH could use standard vows if he doesn't want to write them. Or you could write vows that work for both of you. Either way, I think it's a sweet sentiment.

We're not. We aren't creative with written words. Plus it'll probably end up x-rated.

We're writing our own vows. I think it's a very personal touch and it's important to both of us. Has he said why he doesn't want to? If he's not sure he would be able to come up with anything or doesn't know where to start, there are tons of guides online to writing them, maybe you could sit down and go through them together to see if he gets any inspiration and warms up to the idea.

I want too, but I am a horrible writer.

We're using the traditional vows for the ceremony (with a few changes) but writing letters to each other. Neither one of us wants to be crying through our vows, nor do we want to be worried about carrying pieces of paper down the aisle with us

About half of my couples do, but most people have zero idea of what vows truly are. They are promises that you make in order to keep your marriage strong. They are not a recounting of your relationship (that's why I'm there). They are not rambling anecdotes about your life together. They should not include things that are so emotional you can't say them out loud or so embarrassing that your FS will be mortified. Put those words in a letter to each other. (Well, maybe not the embarrassing ones..)

They should be partly funny, partly sentimental (if that's you) and personal. They should also be short; by the time you get to the vows, the guests know the end is near. They have no patience for War and Peace no matter how brilliant you think it is. Tough love from someone who watched guests' eyes roll back in their heads.

Eight lines max; four of what qualities you love about them

Four promises to them to keep your marriage strong and nurtured.

The end. Keeping any type of writing succinct and tight is a fantastic skill, and this is no exception.

Our officiant had a lot of suggestions, readings, wording, etc. for ceremony language. We picked different parts, tweaked some wording and rearranged it to suit us. So we didn't write our own, but selected and arranged it!

Both DH and I felt writing our own would be too personal.

We wrote our own. We felt confident enough since we are also writers :-)