younger sisters pregnancy is exactly one month behind me...upset

I kind of think it's unreasonable to be mad at her for being pregnant at the same time. I doubt she was actually trying to get knocked up considering her age.

This should actually be a precious time where you can share the experience of pregnancy together.

My mom and aunt had children a month apart and it was fine. Neither had their lives together and still don't 15 years later. If anything feel bad that her future will be hard. I have watched all the single moms in my life struggle take a moment to be even more greatful for your adoring husband. You are lucky and she can't steal your bliss if you don't let her.

It sounds like this has been an ongoing issue between you and your sister. I see how it can be frustrating to be in your situation.

However, I think you are being a little unreasonable. It's a life you are talking about here, not a purse or a car that she copied.

Think about the fact that your child will have a cousin of the same age to grow up with. Some of my best childhood memories are the ones that include my cousins.

ETA: My brother and my cousin were born two days apart. My brother was supposed to be born first but my cousin was a month premature. My aunt gave my cousin the name that my mom had picked out for my brother. It may have seemed like a big deal then but those little boys grew up to be the best friends ever. They will be turning 21 in February and planing their party together.

Yeah, if anything this is a time when she's going to need your support considering he situation. I would just love her and enjoy this time with her.

I agree with Soonyee; I don't think your sister did it on purpose. I don't have kids, but I imagine it's not really anything you can plan out. "I'm going to have my baby at 2:30pm on July 12" doesn't really happen. You know what I mean?

I'm sorry you're upset and feel that she stole your thunder, but if she's not in a good relationship, maybe she's reaching out for your support. Talk to her; see what's up.

By the way. Congratulations on your pregnancy.

I would talk to her about my infertility issues when I was feeling down that nothing was happening and I would tell her how I want a baby so bad and want to start my family and she would say me to I want all those things too and I said not now though right? You want to go to school first and get married find someone you love first right? And she said what's wrong with now? ...umm your 18 not married with someone too old and you work in fast food your still a kid and her response was no I'm 18. So yeah she was trying I just don't know why I'm so upset over it

Maybe its the pregnancy hormones!

I know you don't think her situation is right to bring a child into, but it could feel right for her.

When she told me I ended up going off on her and yelling at her because I took her several times to get bc because of her relationship situation and I said some pretty mean things then she stopped talking to me for a while and I have said sorry for being so selfish and now I'm trying to see the good in this situation but deep down I'm still upset and can't seem to get over it.

I can understand why you wouldn't be thrilled about your sister's situation, and her relationship. What man in his thirties would go after a girl who is in (or just graduated) high school? There is definitely cause for concern here, especially for her child.

It is not reasonable for you to be upset that your sister is taking the spotlight off you. Talk to your husband or someone whom you trust to help you work through these unhealthy feelings. You'll be able to think more clearly about how you can help your sister get through her predicament.

Yeah it sucks. I doubt anyone gets pregnant on purpose at 18. The bright side is that your child will grow up with a cousin as his/her first friend. My cousin and I are 9 days apart and we grew up together.

My sister got pregnant years ago. Four months later, I was pregnant. Two months later, I had a miscarriage. My sister showed very little sympathy as I went through my miscarriage, and even was kind of snotty to me at her baby showers, etc. (demanding I be there at all three of them, getting upset when I couldn't go to one of them, not acknowledging me when I was there). She became the Pregnancy Queen.

She told me later that she was extremely upset that I was pregnant at the same time as her, that she was jealous I was stealing her thunder. I felt like I was slapped in the face.

Be the bigger person. Try to find some comfort in having someone close to you being pregnant at the same time - you can get support during the difficult times. Unless she, or you, have a miscarriage, your pregnancies will forever be joined - baby showers near each other, birthday parties, etc.

Hope things turn out well.

As someone who has a child at age 17 it passes me off when people say "she ruined her life". Seriously? If she does nothing nothing and lives off welfare, then yeah. But going to college is a VERY feasible option with a child. It's seriously disheartening to hear people continuously say things like this when there ARE success stories...just because all the shitty stories end up in the media doesn't mean all are like that.

You're being incredibly selfish and she hasn't ruined her life. That's really ignorant to say.

I feel your being very selfish. I was just turning 20 when I got pregnant. I was working at a sporting good store makes 7.75 an hour and I didn't have anyone down me about my job or getting pregnant. My sister who is 8 years older, had a child at the time and was trying for another was thrilled. She helped me every step of the way and we shared a lot through the process. It's a pregnancy not a competition, like someone mentioned it's not a car or a purse, it's a life. Frustration is understandable because you want to protect her but unfortunately she is 18 and you can't protect her behind those closed doors. You need to just relax (pregnancy hormones suck) and enjoy this time with her. It's a giant step in her life so she will need you now more then ever

Oh and the father Of my daughter I'm engaged to and we've been together since I was 15, now 25.

The best thing I can say is relax and be the bigger person. Yes, your sister is pregnant at 18 and 2 months after you. There's no need to be jealous or selfish. Instead of being upset with her, support her through this. Support each other because pregnancy is an adventure within itself.

I think your being extremely disrespectful to your sister. I understand you might be in a better situation to have a baby, but that doesn't mean she can't. I know plenty of people who have had children at a young age and ended up becoming successful. And it upsets me when people try to push the standard "school, marriage, baby" life on someone who doesn't want that. I was married a few weeks after I turned 18 and pushed off college for a year. I didn't take the standard road but that doesn't mean i ruined my life.

I know you are thrilled to be blessed with a baby (congrats!!), but that does not mean all eyes have to be on you....it's kinda selfish and vain.

Also, how are you going to feel when your niece/nephew is born and you look back on your sisters pregnancy and remember how much you resented her and didn't want her to have a baby? You are pretty much resenting your unborn niece/nephew because your not getting all the attention...that's just sad.

I completely agree with Lisa. My mom had me at 16. She dropped out of school. She went back 2 years later and got her GED, then she got her Associates degree, and about 5 years ago got her Bachelors. So even though having a child at young age is frowned upon, so many situtations develop into success stories.

I don't think you should be upset with your sister. I think you have a heart to heart with her and be there to support her because ultimately thats what she needs.

^^^ a lot of the time some of the must successful people come from some of the hardest situations...that's what gives them the drive to succeed =]

^^^Agreed. I had some really crazy ISH that has happened to me and I'm still standing about to marry the man of my dreams.

Imagine what your sister is going through. At least your relationship is stable and you are married. Odds are her baby daddy is not going to be in the picture. So what if people feel sorry for her? It IS tough raising a baby alone. Show her some support rather than worry about your thunder. Yes it is selfish, sorry.